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Relationship, Family and Mental Health

Cruel comments caused postpartum depression

4yrs ago I became a mum first the first time, the world was in Covid which made for an isolating first time experience.

When my daughter was born, my cousin who is 15yrs older than me. Passed a comment saying that “when people don’t look after their babies, that’s when I visit” it was unprovoked, and a strange addition to the conversation. She also made out that she knew my health visitor (HV), when I eventually told my HV she had never heard of my cousin. And agreed it was cruel and a threat to say to a new mum who was doing a good job. For context she’s not a social worker, but a support worker.

I was taken aback by the comment, and I distanced myself as it felt like a threat. My daughter was cared for, and loved so the need to say it was odd. Ever since our relationship has been strained, she’s never apologised for saying it. And unbeknownst to her, most of our family know what was said.

I’m finding it incredibly hard to be close to her again, as it was a cruel comment that began my postpartum depression spiral.

What would you do?