Delayed attraction

Anybody else not really like your husband until years later? Lol. So physically I’ve always been attracted to my husband but mentally I haven’t always been. We have been together 5 years and like the last couple of months I just have this strong feeling that came over me regarding my husband and I’m just extremely attracted to everything about him lol. Even things I don’t like that he does has turned into things that I just simply love because I love him so much. It’s almost like the honey moon phase again. Maybe it’s because I want another baby soon….? It’s weird because I feel like certain milestones in relationships like buying a house together or having the first child should make this feeling come but I just randomly started feeling this way. Can anyone else relate? And yes we do have kids, dogs, a house and everything else together already lol

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I’m confused? Are you saying you didn’t like your husband until 5 years into your relationship? Or that you liked him, went through a lull and now like him again?

For what it's worth this used to be kind of standard for marriage - people didn't marry for love and frequently were paired by their families with someone they barely knew, so they either grew to hate each other, built a solid marriage over time and made it work, or they grew to truly love each other. So it's not unheard of.

I feel like in my marriage I'm more in love with my husband now than I was in the beginning, but I think it's because I fully understand what long term commitment and deep love is supposed to be. There's a word for it in Russian, "Pragma" - which means practical and pragmatic love, but also deep, long-lasting, and enduring love. It's distinct from the honeymoon phase and considered to be more solid and reliable, so maybe you've just discovered it for yourself. 😊

Thats lovely. I'm happy for you.

I'm glad you're happy but why did you marry him if you didn't find him attractive in the first place? 😅

Yeah, I definitely understand what you mean! It's not that you loved him "less" before, just differently.

In Game of Thrones, Catelyn Stark talks to her son Robb about her relationship with Ned - they didn't love each other initially, they barely knew each other, but they built a strong relationship over time, and grew to know true, deep affection for each other. She told him that it may not be as exciting as passionate love, but it is stronger, more stable, and enduring. I think that not everyone reaches this point in their relationships, so I'd say you're very lucky and blessed!

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