The bounce back ideology is damaging to women

Yes and no.

I agree the whole rushing to look like you did prebaby is unrealistic and unhealthy. It’s not helped by celebrities and influencers pushing it through unhealthy means like surgery and detoxes either. It can be unhealthy mentally and physically for some, fuelled by societal pressure, but it’s also a good thing for many.

For me, I didn’t put a timeframe on getting back into my old clothes but I did aim to get back to my pre baby body. I wasn’t fit and healthy post baby, I was overweight and it was affecting my parenting and lifestyle. Yes I had changed mentally into a mum but I needed to change physically into a healthier mum.

Some people can gain their pre pregnancy figure back easier than others but there’s also a toxic culture of those who shame women who do chose to prioritise their health instead of just being mum 24/7.

Yes and no. If I would have stayed at the weight I was after both deliveries, even 3 months PP, I would have been unhealthy. I think people should do whatever makes them happy and shouldn’t feel pressure to be something they’re not. BUT in order to feel good about myself, be healthy and set good examples for my kids, I wanted to “bounce back”.

I think for most people theres no such thing. Maybe for young moms maybeee they can look close to what they did pre baby but anyone over 28 is just not gonna look the same nor should they. We need to stop obsessing with looking like we did before pregnancy. Its unhealthy. And unnecessary. Theres way too much pressure on women altogether.

The “bounce back” is not only about looks for me it’s about strength. We lose so much muscle mass, our core is f*kd, out pelvic floor is f*kd leading to some women leaking pee while coughing/sneezing/jumping/laughing for years after, our back is weak, our posture is out the window and we lose like an inch of where our shoulders used to be from all the heaviness of the belly and crouching down to BF and picking up babies etc. for me it’s not about the weight like yes I’d love to fit into my old cute clothes again but I wanna gain my strength back that I lost through pregnancy and birth, I felt so WEAK. I was out of breathe easily, my stamina gone. I wanna be healthy for me and my kids, I wanna run and jump and crawl in the playcentre mazes, have half of their energy. That’s why I was motivated to bounce back. It wasn’t for society it was for me.

I agree with you ladies, I think it’s important to be healthy and be in shape. I think you can go back to pre pregnancy weight and fitness but I’m talking size and body shape wise I don’t know how realistic that is. I’ve had people tell me I don’t even look like I had a baby. I was depressed and not eating so dropped alot of weight and fast. It’s glorified in society to look exactly the same as you did before and people feel pressured to take drastic measures to do so. I think it’s important to exercise to be healthy, not too much about fitting into my jeans ( which I was obsessive about in the first few months due to society pressure).

I think it’s harder for women who were super fit before having kids and then they were “derailed” for their fitness because of kids.
I wasn’t super fit before and didn’t really feel any pressure to bounce back but I also don’t have people around me who emphasize weight loss or anything. Even when I did lose weight I looked at my old clothes and realized that I don’t like them anymore anyway. I dressed in very tight youthful clothes, I had a whole closet of clothes I would wear to clubs/bars. Didn’t need those anymore. Got rid of it all.