10 month old refusing food

My little girl has been getting particularly fussy over the past month and doesn’t want to eat much at all! The only thing I’ll be sure she’ll eat is porridge in the morning but other than that she just isn’t interested. I try and make meal times really fun, positive and low pressure too.

I thought she might be filling up on milk too much so have paced feeds out more and dropped the amount a bit, but it hasn’t made a difference.

She’s due to start at nursery next week and I’m worried she won’t eat while she’s there. During her settling in sessions she would barely touch anything.

Does anyone have any advice? Would love to hear from anyone that has been through similar and how you handled it (and managed to get food in to them!)

in our community

Left my Inlaws in tears today😢

My partner didn’t stand up for me (despite me nudging him multiple times to say something) & when I tried to talk to my parents about it, they said I’m being dramatic and baby will be ‘fine’.
So I just wanted to see what other mummas think💔

My little one is currently 5 weeks old.

Every time I see the in-laws that do or say stupid things which makes me dread seeing them. I really tried to stay positive today and hope that it would be a good visit.

but

1) The dad had a bad cough & cold and said “I won’t go too close to baby because I’m ill”……2 minutes later, he was pulling her hands out of her mouth. Then she was putting her hands back in. Then he was pulling them back out. So his germs were quite literally going in her mouth. (I was nudging my partner to tell him to stop, but he didn’t see what I was nudging for & laughed because he thought I found it funny)

2) the MIL was KISSING MY BABY ON THE LIPS. I’ve even told everyone on my side of the family not to do this and that this is for mum and dad only.

3) because baby was eating her hands, I said oh she might be hungry. She said “no don’t worry”….then SHUVED HER FINGERS IN HER MOUTH & laughed about it saying “I used to do this when he was a baby”.
In my eyes, do what you want to you OWN baby, but she is NOT YOURS.
By this point I was quite literally so fed up with biting my tongue and said “I hope your hands are clean because I’m over here sterilising all of her bottles and dummies”. And she said “oh…are you?”.

4) my baby hasn’t let me put her down since day 1 of being born. She told me it’s my fault because I pick her up when she cries. (My own mum agreed with this when I tried to tell to her about it). Newborns cannot self soothe yet, I’m not going to let her cry it out when she just wants her mumma. Don’t tell me it’s my fault and I’ve caused it.

5) every time I see them the mil comments on my weight.

I told my parents I’m worried sick about her getting poorly and ending up hospitalised because of these people. Every time I visit them, this sort of thing happens. I keep giving them the benefit of the doubt and more things continue to happen.

If I try to communicate with my partner about it, he gets angry with me and makes out like I’m having a go at him. When I’m simply asking him to stand up for our daughter because she can’t speak up for herself yet, we are her voice.

Both my parents said I’m being dramatic because “tiny babies don’t get sick, it’s only older babies”.

I’m honestly so so upset because she was so safe In my womb a few weeks ago and I do everything I can to take care of her the best I can. Then people like that just don’t seem to care.

My partner blames it on their generation because they’re quite old. But my grandparents are the same age and they would never do or say the things they do.

Ive lost all patience with these people. I don’t want them to think I’m keeping their granddaughter away from them but I feel like at this point, while she’s tiny, it’s what’s safest for her. I can’t stand being uncomfortable in their presence feeling like my baby is at risk.

Weaning

My 3 month old is showing signs of wanting to eat. She is trying to grip things and bring them to her mouth and constantly staring at our food when we’re eating. She’s starting to teethe aswell. She has very good neck control and is trying her hardest to sit up.
When she is able to hold herself up better and reaches the 4 month mark could I start introducing purées slowly? Would I need to get things approved by the health visitor first? How do I do this?
Other mums I’ve spoke to have said they got approval from drs to give baby rice before 6 months but others are saying not to try purees until 6 months I’m so confused

Overstepping step MIL

My partner’s dad’s wife has started referring to herself as “grandma” or calling LO “my grandson”. Partner and I would like LO growing up knowing his late biological grandmother as “grandma” when we look at pictures of her remembering and honouring her. It’s deeply uncomfortable because we have never had that kind of sacred relationship (she’s made weird comments about LO’s appearance and all sorts of un-grandmotherly gestures) She is painting me out to be the “evil daughter in law” and unfortunately partner’s dad seems to be falling for it. The question is do I just embrace the “evil DIL” trope and tell to eff off? I’m really getting sick of it all of the unwanted dated advice and snide comments.

WTF

How are y’all going to be like “we’ll babysit for you, don’t get a babysitter.” But then turn around not even a week later and be like “we don’t want to watch her at nights.”

Already told y’all my schedule is going to be crazy at the beginning and I don’t get to ask for a specific shift time!!! If you don’t want me getting a babysitter then you need to be okay with watching her, as simple as that. If I don’t trust y’all anymore then I will get a babysitter without telling you, then you’ll barely see her again! My whole paycheck will gladly go to a babysitter than you watching her, if you have such a huge problem with it!!

I’m so tired of these in laws at this point… they promise to babysit my daughter for me when I get my first job after 2 years!!!! And now they complain and bitch about the night shifts, they knew what they were getting into because I informed them just like my employer informed me!!!!! Now it’s possible I’ll have to quit if I don’t stay on morning to mid-day shift because the in laws don’t want to be grandparents.

And I know a few people are probably like, “it’s not their responsibility..” and I get that, I was on the hunt for a babysitter, found one I could get to like and trust. Few days later they go to my husband!!! Not even me!!! And say “don’t get a babysitter, we’ll do it.” I was taking responsibility and finding a situation for MY family and they get in the middle of it.. they made it their responsibility and now they’re back tracking.

People talk of a village and I’m so jealous that we don’t have that. I’m so upset and frustrated that my child doesn’t have that village also. I honestly just want to crawl into a hole and never come out.. I love being a mom but my confidence since being a stay at home mom has severely deteriorated. I love the new independence and confidence I get from working again, from being out and about without my child and having real life adult conversations where I don’t get talked over or waved off, like I do when talking to my mil.

I feel depression sinking in just thinking about quitting and it makes me want to give up, the only thing that keeps me going is my daughter and some days that’s even exhausting..

Again love being a mom

But

I also hate it at the same time, some days..
(Hate being a mom but love being my daughter’s mom, make sense??)

UGHH SO MUCH GOING THROUGH MY BRAIN AT THIS POINT I JUST WANT TO WHACK IT ON A BRICK WALL🙃

Parents with kids 2 and under — did you go through a “roommate phase” with your partner after having a baby?

I’m curious what made it hardest to spend intentional time together: lack of time, exhaustion, childcare, deciding what to do, or something else?

Just a rant

Me and my partner have 3 kids and I just feel so alone.
I’m currently on maternity leave I do every school drop off for our older 2, every pick up, I do dinner every night for the kids, I do every bottle for our 7 month old and every meal time, I have to get her to sleep every night because she won’t go to sleep for her dad.
He’s self employed and works 5/6 days a week.
This morning he told me he’s having an early finish and said he would be done by 4 so I reached out to my friends and planned to go out for dinner with them. 4oclock came no sign off him; he strolls in at 6:30 goes straight for a 20 minute shower then takes the older 2 kids to bed.
I don’t know what my point of this is I’m just feeling very alone right now.
Don’t get me wrong he’s a great dad when he’s here but I just feel like I’m doing everything especially for our daughter. The last time he gave her a bottle was Saturday morning and that’s because I was in the shower so he had to.