Stay or go?

Hey girls so I need help asap!!
I told my partner a couple weeks ago I needed a break! He hasn’t given me the break and keeps messaging me and trying to prove points I now got to the point where I said enough is enough and told him to stop messaging me

Back story of why I wanted a break is because he’s so lazy! Like so lazy it’s unreal he’s got a daughter from a previous relationship and when she wakes up in the morning he will take her downstairs to his mum and go back to bed (he only has her on weekends) but he’s mum does everything for him she will do his washing does his dinner change HIS daughters nappy all the time make her bottle get her dressed after a bath do her hair ect the list goes on! He don’t make his daughter brush her teeth and doesn’t wipe her private parts once she’s been on the potty except his mum will wipe her bum if she done a poo but he’s mum doesn’t even wipe her front when she’s been for a wee! She’s really constipated they have laxatives but only gives it to her maybe once every 3-4 weeks her mum isn’t any better as she won’t take her doctors to get help! I have to remind HIM to brush his teeth and shower I also feel like he’s still in love with his daughter’s mum! He treats me like I’ve never been treated before (I was in a previous DV) but now the red flags are showing

Now this is where it gets complicated I am currently pregnant with his child! My coil fell out and was waiting to get it replaced as I didnt want another child just yet (I have a daughter from a previous relationship) so I was waiting to get a new contraceptive but didn’t tell him and next I knew I was pregnant abortion was never a option for me as I don’t agree with it but now I’m so in love with her and the thought of having 2 little girls but I’m worried about sharing custody and how he will look after her, I want to breastfeed also. I said to him I want to take her on holiday next year and it was a whole problem and he has to come with me because it’s her first holiday, I’m just struggling at the thought of sharing her because I don’t have to share my first. And if we completely brake up I’ve got to tell him he’s not having her every weekend because my daughter goes to school and I’m going to want to spend time and do things with both of them together. But apparently his daughters mum left him because “she used him for a baby” he’s also very clingy I go to his every weekend and it’s getting harder the heavier pregnant I get he lives a hour 20 mins away but when I’m there he has to touch me and sit right next to me kisses me every 30 seconds or hug me and if he can’t sit next to me he will sit in front of me, if he’s not pretending to be asleep. He gets so involved in my family business.

His family fully accepted me and my daughter and treat her like their own. His step dad is an alcoholic and they both constantly argue and it’s a horrible atmosphere most of the time!

So my question. Is do I stay or go!? What do I do about sharing the baby? I have mixed opinions by everyone most saying leave him and some saying I’m over reacting!
Please help!!

Sorry for the long post! 🩷❤️

in our community

Advice please

Please can I get some advice? My husband is due to go on a trip to Paris for three days to see his friend. However, currently our baby girl is going through the four month regression her sleep is all over the place she’s teething really badly. She also has a cough at the moment and we think she might have a stomach bug because she’s having a lot of toileting issues. I’m taking her to the doctor today. I have been visibly stressed and upset the last few days because it has all become very difficult and challenging and the lack of sleep has not helped. I was due to go and stay with his parents this weekend while he goes on the trip, however yesterday he offered to cancel his trip and stay home with us. I don’t know what to do obviously I would rather he cancelled the trip and stayed with us because things are so difficult and I would be more comfortable with him at home then going and staying with my in-laws. However, if I ask him to cancel, I know I’ll feel so guilty every time I look at him this weekend knowing he could’ve been in Paris having a good time but instead he’s stuck with us what would you do?
Just to add, my husband did say he wasn’t sure he felt particularly comfortable leaving us both this weekend having said that he has not cancelled his trip. He’s asked me if I want him to cancel it.

Caught my husband sneaking out

So I’m out of town for a week visiting family with my son and my husband is at home. I caught him sneaking out on the ring camera from 1 to 4 am, this is the first time I’ve caught him doing anything sketchy but I’ve had a feeling. He’s a great dad and most of the time a good partner but he’s been distant lately I’m a hot head and don’t know how to converse without going straight into burning shit down but I have a kid now and need advise on how to confront and go forward with this info.

Am I the only one...

My husband and I had our son in December and at first he couldn't leave me alone(we didnwait the full 6 weeks before actually doing anything) but around March or April he kinda just lost interest in anything pertaining to us... since then it just seems like any time I try to initiate anything intimate there's always a reason as to why we can't but when he goes to sleep he wants to touch on me like he hadn't just given me a million excuses as to why he didn't want to. We've been together for 7 years and married for 1 so I know it's normal for couples to lose their spark I just didn't think it was going to be so one sided or soon I mean hell we're both in our mid 20s. It makes me feel like there's something wrong with me and I just don't know what to do when I bring it up he gets mad at me like I'm accusing him of something but I just want to know what's changed.

Nursery sign up reminder

For any first time mums thinking of sending their little one to nursery some time between 6months to 2 years, go sign up for the nursery now!!

I'm 19 weeks pregnant and submitted the paperwork for this baby to join the same nursery as my first when I was 15 weeks. Their waiting list is currently over 17 months so they don't have space at my planned return to work time when this baby is 10 months old. This is a small town nursery, I also enquired at my one at work and the wait list was over 24 months.

So just a gentle reminder for anyone thinking of sending their child to nursery, it's never to early to go and look at nurseries and sign your future baby up to one you like.

Lack of quality time with partner

Anyone else feel like they barely have time with their partner anymore?

I feel like as soon as he comes home it’s bed time for my baby girl and then she won’t sleep so we entertain her till she does. Of course I love family time and wouldn’t change it but we do have family that can watch her for a few hours and we still never go on dates or anything.

We were meant to leave her with my sister this weekend and go on a date, but he invited everyone we know for a house warming so I asked him why he did that when we had plans and he said oh yeah we were meant to do that. And it was the end of the conversation. I don’t mind spending time with others, but I’m constantly over stimulated, she’s going through I only want mama phase, and would have loved to only spend time with him this weekend.

He also works mon-fri, and I’m with her 24/7 I kind of resent the fact that he goes to work, eats in peace etc. meanwhile I’m peeing whilst carrying her sometimes and barely have time to eat or shower most days. 😭

Lunch 🍝

Tomato & pea pasta

Sweetcorn
Grated cheese
Grapes and strawberries 😋

Definitely a massive portion! We shall see how much he eats😆