All the in laws

MIL won’t have anything to do with us unless we go to her house. In the beginning, we would ask her to come and sit with baby while we do projects around the house. She always said no if it meant she had to come to our house.

BIL (24) has been providing BIL (15) with THC and has been threatening 15 and his friend group with SA apparently. That’s not something to play around with and is even worse if it’s not playing around. 15 also has been using so much MJ and edibles that he’s ended up in the hospital for it in the past.

SIL (30) is currently engaged to BIL (24) ex fiancé so that’s a hot mess and is choosing a life of drugs. SIL (28) is all about the church and cuts people out of her life when they upset her. When the grandfather passed away, 28 started cutting out family from her life and I made the short list until I couldn’t take it any longer that she refused to speak to my husband. Now I’m blocked as well.

Basically, my whole in-laws are not a part of my kids lives by their own choices and actions. My husband still talks to them but it causes him so much stress and anxiety. He’s the oldest and wants to “fix” everyone. He’s also made comments about how much it hurts that his mother is capable of being a good grandma to his siblings kids but can’t show up for ours ever.

Only BIL really ever used to come around but after the hospitalization of 15, I asked he not be allowed in our home. Now with the SA threats from 24, I want to make the same request. Is it wrong to just want to cut all ties with all of them since they’ve been so awful to our family? I know my husband will never go for it. I had such a hard time going to him and saying I did not want 15 in my home.

I’m now realizing while writing all this that I truly do need to be in therapy. So I guess I am going to be on the hunt for a therapist that won’t break my bank 😕. Also, I know my family isn’t perfect, but they show up and care about my kids. My in-laws used to just send presents and now don’t even do that. Kids are 2 and 3.

in our community

No sitter but cant let myself go into postpartum depression

Brought my little girl to my lash appointment she was so well behaved thank god !!!! Any other mamas end up bringing their kid to their maintenance appointments ?

Am I doing something wrong?

I went for brunch with a new mum friend, both our little boys are 7 months. My LO would not sit at and tbh he rarely does, he had just had a feed and nap, I also offered him a banana which he had half of and convinced him to play with multiple toys but he either wanted to bounce on my lap or for me to walk around with him and eventually got cranky/whingy. I wasn’t able to finish my food. The other LO was sitting calmly the whole time and chewing on his teether. I even offered my LO a teether. Am I doing something wrong, am I spoiling him by picking him up constantly if he’s not crying and just whinging 😅

Has the new government rules on screen time stressed anyone else out?

Screen time reliance was already stressing me but I'm home alone as many of us are...I have no village and a very full on and demanding boy. My son is 19 months and in a really hard phase whinging and clingy wise....we don't do iPads and tablets (unless I absolutely have to if he's throwing an absolute fit having a nappy change and I don't want shit all over the wall!)
We do however end up doing teletubbies and dancing fruits during "high stress times" of the day. Usually cooking or if he's having an awful meltdown...popping teletubbies on means he smiles and relaxes, and I can get our food cooked and the kitchen tidy.
In the evening we allow him another half hour whilst we make food if he's in a particularly demanding mood and wanting to be held the entire time. Then we switch off teletubbies and put something soft like quiz shows or comedy on for my partner and I and we play with our son at the same time. He usually zones the TV out if it's not his program.
I feel so guilty for every second of screen time now. By the time he's finally gone to bed at 9-10pm (he fights sleep like crazy) I just have to fall into bed myself. My partner can stay up watching his TV but I can't make it past 10 (proof that being a stay at home mum is harder than a regular job much!?)

Husbands attitude..

I’m unhappy with the way my partner acts with our son. So before we had kids he was the most chilled, fun loving person & I thought what a breath of fresh air compared to my ex who was an abusive narcissist!

However since we’ve bought a house and had our son (he’s 4) it’s like he can’t handle parenting.
His fuse has become short & the last few months he just seems to lose his temper at our son & me over the smallest things. I understand kids are frustrating and we all shout at times but he screams in his face and it really upsets our son & honestly it makes me so sad that he gets so angry over trivial things, often I have to step in & take over cos I’m worried he might smack him or something.

I’m a SAHM and so I’m with my son every day yet I can control myself. I’m more laid back (he’s my 2nd child) maybe cos I’ve been here before. I feel maybe as he was brought up with an Asian father who was quite strict it’s given him high expectations of expected behaviour?
I have spoken to him about how I’m not happy with it & that he should walk away but he just gets defensive and throws his dummy out the pram!
What’s your partner like with discipline? Do they shout and do you ever disagree with the way they are?

USA people - have you ever personally experienced a school shooting?

we talk about moving over there every now and again but in our heads it’s so risky, even if the education system was good, to send kids to school over there

School

I know being a stay at home mom is meant to be staying at home with the kids. But do you ever consider sending them to school? Especially if you have multiples? Or do you just homeschool? I feel like I want to send my oldest to school and stay home with the baby. My oldest just turned 4. What should he be in (pre k or… ?) I’m not sure.