Would this upset you…

Our baby never sleeps, so our current arrangement is I will feed her to sleep around 8-9pm and then when she wakes initially my husband will hold her in his arms until around 11pm-12am, then he puts her down and goes next door to the spare room to sleep for the night and I do the rest of the night alone (but obviously have been able to get a couple of hours head start on sleep while he’s been holding her)…

Today he has gone to watch the football with his friends and had several drinks and got home around 8pm… I fed her to sleep as normal and put her down and I heard him getting up to leave, when I asked where he was going he said next door, and when I was confused he said “I don’t trust myself to stay awake with her” implying he had drank too much and was using it as his excuse to get out of helping…

So not only have I solo parented all day, I now have to all night with no help at all, and then we are straight into the working week where it’s all on me…

I just feel SO ANGRY about it - if it was a one off thing or a special occasion it would be fine - but football feels like it’s on every other week and it’s not acceptable to me to drink enough where you are unable to support your struggling partner for the first couple of hours of the night?!

Do I have a right to be annoyed?????

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I can definitely understand why you'd feel annoyed, I guess it's all down to how often it happens, we all deserve a break however this in future needs to be communicated before he goes out, e.g. I'm letting my hair down tonight, so please don't rely on me, then you'd be able to slightly adjust your schedule to support this. Equally, I'd hope he'd do the same if you wanted to get out the house. I think you have a right to be annoyed, but I'd 100% rather my husband hold his hands up and say I don't trust myself, than risk baby's life for the sake of me getting less sleep for one night. At least he's honest and not making up some BS reason on why he can't help out x

I'd also add, is there any reason he needs to sleep in another room, is baby up numerous times throughout the night to the point he'd get not enough sleep? My husband always gets up to make the bottle or do the nappy change & then i stay awake to do the feed (same would work if I was EBF). Then on his days off, we'd take it in turns to do night feeds/early mornings x

This is my everyday, I have a 6 week old. I do all cooking, all cleaning, days with baby , nights with baby. I don’t think he’s even washed a single bottle :) he also goes to football straight after work and doesn’t get home until midnight so he’s out 8am - 12am and I’m home w the baby alone. It’s exhausting. Just talk to him & tell him how you feel. Maybe you can have a full day to yourself? On the weekend? Where you can just be you for a day and go out and do what you want? It’s fair for both parties then

I don’t feel like it 😂 it’s exhausting and I’d like him to help more but everhthing he does with the baby just makes me angry & I want him instantly back. I’d like him to help more in the house too but he will “clean the kitchen” but leave chopping boards out and pans on the stove?? I just hate him right now lol I could rant forever

Yeah it is really frustrating and you should be allowed to have free time & not be taken the piss out of like he didn’t need to drink that much?
Also try to enjoy it? People keep telling me that. Enjoy baby while he’s small but it’s so hard to do when you’re exhausted

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Baby clothes

Just out of curiosity, why do parents love zipper onesies?

Don’t get me wrong, I tried zipper ones it’s easy to zip in and out when putting it on the first time and taking it out, but I find it difficult when changing diapers especially when baby is asleep.

I prefer those kimono style buttons where it’s easy to button or too down button with crotch snaps.

Is everyone thinking the same or different? Lol

At this point I’m not enjoying motherhood

My 22 month old is horrendous at the moment🫣 biting, hitting, pushing, pulling and shoving not only adults but children he also wants what other children have and will just snatch it away from them.

We repeat ‘nice hands’ ‘be gentle’ ‘let’s share’ etc

But how do I make him understand what he’s doing isn’t very nice? At the end of the day I feel like I’ve just been saying his name all day and nothing else.

What can I do?

This might rattle some people

Ok, this might get a bit long, and a bit bumpy, so get comfy and buckle up.

So about a week or 2 ago, there was a post on here regarding sleepovers. Not letting their child go to them as you can't trust who'll be at the house etc.

Now, given recent incidents in nurseries and schools, plus my own experience back in the 90s, I am more concerned about sending my child to nursery and later school than I am to a friend's house for a sleep over.

The other day a man was jailed for abusing children at the nursery he worked at. A woman has been arrested for sleeping with an underage boy and then getting pregnant by a different underage boy while on bail for the first offence.

Young girls and boys get sexually harassed and bullied when at school, not all of them. But more than you think. And not just by other kids, but by adults who we as parents are trusting to look after our kids.

A sleepover, is a more controlled environment, with only a handful of people coming into contact with your child. A school, a club etc there can be 100s of people coming into contact with your child.

I was targeted at 7 years old by the owner of a prominent private school. Thankfully, I wasn't SA'd. In year 5 of primary school, I started to develop early, I was harassed by the boys and teachers made remarks about how my uniform didn't fit right, always "adjusting it" around my chest and legs.

Years 7-9 of secondary school were hell. But it was all under the guise of "we're just messing around". A teacher twanging my exposed bra strap (none uniform day) is not "messing around".

Boys pinning me down trying to rip open my shirt to see my breasts.

I fear for my daughter. I hope she takes after my father's family, flat chested.

We need to educate all our children, what is acceptable behaviour. And to come to us, as their parents should ANYTHING happen.

Dummy

My baby has had a dummy since about 2 weeks old (now 5 months) and over the course of the last month we weaned her off it during the day only for naps and night (which was fine) and then 5 days took it completely away during the day.

The first day no dummy was fine, the second bit rougher. But now it feels impossible she just moans and cries all the time it takes ages for her to go down to sleep (she’s always been an amazing sleeper)

I thought it was meant to get better as time went on not worse. I’m at my wits end I dunno what to do.

Currently typing this as she screams uncontrollably in the car and I cry with her cos I can’t do anything.

Help

My LO every feed. Drs don’t seem to think it’s a problem the whole Muslim cloth gets soaked so much I’m using towels now. I’ve tried size O teats he gets really frustrated and still spills it out :(

Of these two, which seems more overall “demanding” to you, overall? Lighthearted poll, not putting anyone down 🫶🏼

As a mum who breastfed for 3 years, I think formula feeding seems 100x harder and more demanding. I give those mamas all the credit because I could not keep up with that faff haha. I truly don’t understand why people say breastfeeding is more effort, other than the fact that no one else can do it. But personally I’d take that over endless bottle prep & cleaning.