Husband is upset I won’t support his career change

My husband hates his job, and it’s back breaking work for very low pay. I’ve been encouraging him to change his careers, but he says he has no dreams. I told him to really think about what he likes and what he’s good at, and he finally came up with a career he’d like to explore. The issue is that this specific career is not something I am willing to support. He brought it up and I was immediately appalled, so he shut down and told me nevermind and that he’s sorry he brought it up. He said he just thought about what he’s very good at, and I said he’s good at lots of other things. I never thought this was the direction he would turn, and it’s probably the one job I am putting my foot down on. Now he won’t talk to me about new careers at all.

I honestly feel stupid even saying what the job he wants is. Just know it’s not a respectable job I want the father of my children having, in my opinion.

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I’m sooo curious now 😂 But this is definitely a hard situation, since obviously both of your personal dreams and standards for each other matter. Hopefully it can be a continued conversation. Maybe ask what appeals to him about that job? Why it inspires him?

Im curious obviously, but to your question, what is the talent he wanted to explore? Could he use that skill but in a different profession?

I think it’d also be good to take some time to reflect on why this career bothers you so much. Are you overly concerned by what other people think? It may be more for you to adjust your mindset than for him to adjust his dreams

It’s really hard to give advice or opinions without knowing what the job is 😕

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You’re incognito, just say the job. No one knows who you are anyway

He wants to be a porn star… he says he’s really good at sex and thinks he could make good money doing it, and would also enjoy the job…

Wow!! I don’t blame your reaction tbh. That’s totally unrealistic for a career choice at this point and stage of your lives, especially as (I’m assuming), you’re not ok with him having sexual contact with other people

Tbh I assumed he gave you an unrealistic job as an answer so that you would stop suggesting he change career paths. If that was his intention, it seemed like it worked 😅

this! Most people aren’t going to be on board with their spouse suddenly getting in to porn.

If he’s miserable at his job, can he go to a community college and see if any programs jump out at him? If he doesn’t want to make changes, then he needs to just learn to deal with his emotions about his job. Sure he can complain now and then, but he will need to have reasonable complaints like a worse day than usual than just him being miserable every day.

Is this real? 😅
You asked your husband what career option he’d enjoy and he basically said sex… I’m flabbergasted LOL

Honestly thought it would be a male stripper but pornstar?¿ I’m sorry and mad for you 😭

Well that is a difficult one 😅 i would not be fine with this I think. Then again my inner feminist would be mad if a man doesn’t respect sex work when a woman does it 🤔 there are jobs in the industry that are probably less of a problem for you, there’s lots of companies like cheex who do online sex education and probably have lots of behind the scenes work. The porn and adult industry is huge and he could probably find something in the sector that would be a compromise for the two of you.
If my partner simply wanted to have sex on camera with other people that would be a deal breaker but maybe there is a solution to this 😅

He’s having a midlife crisis
Expressing it would be fun is ridiculous it’s a job does he know it carries responsibility just like any other job
Imagine you said heck yeah let’s both get into that industry how comfortable would he be with that

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Here for advice really, I'm going back to work early January.

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