Friendships post-partum

It goes without saying that friendships go both ways…effort has to come from each side. However, what are people’s views on friendships in the post-natal period? Do the same rules apply? Should friends make more of an effort with your friendship when you’ve had a baby? Taking into account how all-consuming having a baby is? I’m interested what people think…🤔

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Before I had my son, I made so much more effort to contact my friends who had children as I knew that they were busy and life gets in the way, I forgave the days / weeks without contact and made myself available when they wanted to meet. I played at playgyms while they sat....
Now where are they? 🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️

that’s sad 😢 I feel a bit let down by my friends (I only have two). Not even a message every now and then to ask how I’m doing. Maybe it’s time to build some new friendships 🫤

i actually recently saw a tiktok about this and the comments were horrendous! i mean what marissa said 100%. all relationships have a variety of “give and take” because there are always going to be situations when the extra effort is required or somebody is less able!

I had a whole moment with a “best friend” because she left when she got pregnant and I apologized for not…. Seeking after her moving and not being there for her. I’ve been to all of her daughter’s birthdays, events. Sent presents for holidays. Etc.

She has met my baby twice, since said conversation. Couldn’t tell you the last time she text me first that wasn’t her trying to sell me something vintage Disney. (her “company”) or needs to stay at my house because I live centrally

I really don’t know how to navigate humans at this point I feel like.
I’m happier being a home body with my little man.

I ment to hit the second one not the same rule apply sorry

I’m the type to invite my friends over PP. I had 4 friends come to hospital the days following and they kinda felt privileged for the invite so they all came. And in the days and weeks following I’d ask my sister (who lives 5min away) for milk or bread but really, I know she’ll come w a chai latte and keep me company and watch baby for me while I hang up laundry or shower 😂 I like company m I’m not one to have a “6w bubble” to settle in, I have friends and sisters over from day 1 so I guess it’s easier for me and not isolating or lonely since I always have someone there w me. I don’t have to host when they’re here, they cook themselves and make their own coffee. And sometimes they just invite themselves over which they know I don’t mind that

in our community

Needing a mommy friend!

Hey girls! I'm needing to make more mommy friends. I just have no social life and I'm tired of being alone🤣

Please don't hesitate to reach out! 💕

Return to work

Any fellow Teacher assistants out there that have returned to work in July time ?
We only get paid for 39 weeks of the year and it obviously gets spread out over the 12 month period. I will be due to go on Mat leave start of November. If I go back at the end of July possibly just the last week will I still then get pay as per contract for August as normal or will I only get paid the hours I worked ?
Because currently my SMP would end mid August so would then have no pay until the end of September after my return if I don’t go back until the September 🤦🏼‍♀️

Friends?

Where are the women that actually want to connect with other moms and become friends? It feels like a never ending cycle of my time getting wasted responding to people that can’t respond back.

Anyone else not feeling like being intimate?

I'm 6 weeks PP and I have no desire to be intimate. I tried to explain to my husband that my body hasn't been mine for almost a year now with growing a human. Not to mention giving birth, recovering and bleeding off and on for 6 weeks, and to top it off I'm exclusively pumping so I feel like a cow 4 hours of the day. All he heard was "so don't touch you. Great."
Anyone else feel this way right now?

Mixed feelings

Hi, I guess I just need a place to vent and someone to listen.

My daughter is about to turn 1, and I am feeling a whole bunch of different emotions. I feel regret because for most of her first year, I was sad most of the time because I was dealing with so much loss, suffering and pain in my own life that I feel I missed out on being fully present. At the same time, I know I did the best that I could while also carrying so much alone. I have been alone during my pregnancy and motherhood. Lots of people say they are alone too, but always have a best friend or a mother present. I have been alone, entirely, on my own, without 1 person. My family traumatised me, my friends betrayed me, and I was left to deal with pregnancy, birth, and motherhood alone. I love my daughter with every fibre of my being but somehow still struggle with being patient, kind and loving at times. A part of me is resentful because I sometimes wish I never had a child, but I know that is only because I am doing it alone. If I had people around me, if I had support, if I had love, if I had someone pouring into me the way I constantly pour into her, I feel I would be a much more grateful and joyful mother. Don’t get me wrong, I am not a bad mother and I don’t treat her badly. I just lose my temper sometimes, or don’t have the patience to slow down sometimes. I feel so much guilt and sadness when these moments or sometimes days happen. Sometimes I treat her like I don’t want her around, but that isn’t true: it’s me who is carrying pain and who is hurt about where my life is. She deserves pure love and nothing less. I am just so tired of life. I’m tired of being alone. I’m tired of not having support or love in my life. I’m tired of living in a tiny studio apartment and feeling like I’m not a good enough mother for not being able to provide a bigger home for her. I’m tired of struggling financially. I’m tired of trying to meet new people and then always ending up not being able to connect with them because of toxic or unhealthy behaviour that I refuse to tolerate. I’m tired of life feeling like an uphill battle. I’m tired of feeling like I am of less value because I have a child and cannot do the things that I want to do. I’m tired of feeling like God has left and forgotten me. I don’t want to be here anymore, and yet I can’t give up on my daughter because I’m all she has and I refuse to abandon her the way I was abandoned by mine. I’m just so tired.

Thank you for listening.

So everyone is a witch now a days huh? 🤥🤨 lol

Has anyone else noticed more women being “witchy” once the season hits? It’s not a trend, it’s a lifestyle and a belief for many who practice. 💚💜