Sex and Relationships with Railey Molinario

Rose toy

This might be TMI but if anyone has one and is willing to help I’d be so grateful because now I feel like I’ve wasted money.

I don’t know if I’m doing the rose toy right. It’s very strong but I don’t mind that, I have achieved really strong orgasms from it before yet it takes ages for me to find what works. So long that my hand is cramping and I just want to give up. It’s so frustrating as well because if I finally find the right spot and have to stop for a bit then I can’t find that damn spot again even if I’ve not changed my actual body positioning.

Then there has been times where I felt pain from it. My toy is also super super loud and I’m not sure if that’s normal. I read online that if it’s loud it means it’s not enclosed around the clit and you need to put more pressure on it or reposition it yet if I put more pressure it can hurt and if I reposition it’s still loud. I even like find my clit with my fingers and then angle it up and then once it feels like it’s enclosed I’ll move it around to find my sweet spot and it’ll literally like come un suctioned.

Is it me or my toy? I wanted to use this for a while as the vibrator I have now is a load of wack as well. I would like to be able to use it when having sex with my partner too as when I use it with him and it makes this loud like lawn mower kind of sound(it really is so loud)it always makes me feel awkward and I have to spend ages re-adjusting.

Please help a girl out 😭

in our community

Looking for mom friends

Just a stressed out first time mom with a 4 month old, lost a lot of my friends after being pregnant and having the baby and I just want someone to talk to or maybe even hang out with. 🫤

Am I in the wrong?

So BD and I were just talking and the question of when did I lose my virginity came up. I did not feel comfortable answering him. So I told him. The reason behind this is when he knows something about my past he uses it against me later on during arguments. I said this to him. He said he wouldnt. I still dont trust him because hes done this many times. Mind you ive been with him 4 years. Ive never asked abt his past hes never asked much about mine. I honestly think if it happened before me its not something I NEEEEED to know unless he wants to share. Dont get me wrong I want to know about him and what made him who he is today. But intimicy is just… idk. Honestly Im not proud of the age I lost mine. But mostly its just me not wanting this brought up later on being the reason why I dont want to tell him. Anyway aftwr I said I didnt feel comfortable and kept saying I wouldnt tell. He kind of gave me an ultimatum saying he didnt want to be w me if I keep secrets. I responded by saying well I dont want to be w you if youre not going to respect my boundaries and youre going to call it quits over this. Everntually we said well talk about it after work. Am I wrong? Should I just tell him? Or what should I do or say?

Relationship struggles and a newborn

Strap got for the long post.

I’ve been with my partner since the beginning of the year. We fell pregnant straight away, unplanned and even on contraception…. We chatted and he didn’t want another kid and managed my expectations re that.

I said I would have the baby on my own and he changed his mind saying he would be there for us. We had a very fast yet surprising secure relationship since and he is a great guy.

He has 2 other children from his marriage. His ex is nice but they have no boundaries at all, they are very matey and I’ve had to flag stuff several times as it feels like they are very much still husband and wife.

I had the baby 4 weeks ago, after many hospital stays, complications and worries. He works stupidly hard 6 days a week and had shared custody of other children.

The routine with the others is not in place and it’s late bedtimes, dinner times and early wake ups. Which makes it hard both while pregnant and now with a newborn, I seem to be on duty alone loner because if we are with the other they need his support even though they are a lot older. I’m not asking for them to be ignored or disregarded but it’s tough when it impacts my “time off” when he is out 8-8 and I’m in bed about 9.

His ex and him do “swaps” and make childcare plans but I have blown up today as I feel that I’m not considered. Having the others extra means I’m solidly having the newborn upto 10pm whilst he bedtimes the others and also then from 1.30/3am when the baby comes to bed. He needs rest but I take over when they come up…. And the others sometimes are awake 4.30-6 then go downstairs.

I’ve tried to communicate my needs and need for support. It just lands as if I begrudge his other kids and it isn’t that, I just need support and us time is never a thing now so I feel emotional to have to find more of myself for long running on nothing.

I have chronic health conditions and they make motherhood even harder. His ex is supported by her family and his family collecting the kids, having sleeps overs and doing school runs. Stupidly I feel envious because I don’t have that.

Because we are fresh, we have never spoken finances or stuff like that even when I brought it up several times. His response is “I will try and help where I can” and he buys stuff. However, I’m getting triggered that the ex sleeps soundly knowing all that’s taken care off, when her time off starts and all the clubs are paid for by him.

I feel like I’m the surrogate, the silly woman that got pregnant and so on. I feel like I watch on their ironed out agreements and maybe it appears still a team. I have no security or breathing space myself to know he has the reins…. I have a house alone, bills and everything to cover and think of.

I brought pretty much everything for our child. He has got stuff too but it’s hugely disproportionate and things compounded by the fact him and his ex have a “clothing fund” account for their kids…. Sounds stupid but I’m again envious she never has to think about laying it all out herself.

He is a great guy, doing all he can. I feel so bad for moaning and feeling lonely, like a solo parent and arguing all the time because I can’t shake the disparity.

We had a prem baby and got kept in an hour after we got out the ex and kids came over. Within no time his ex said she was overwhelmed as she had the kids extra days (his mum helped alot) and we couldn’t have them over night due to my surgery. Then there was the question of half term times, collections, clubs resuming and so on. I felt and feel invisible.

I can’t shift the constant feel like I’m alone and solo parenting. If I wasn’t in a relationship with him, he would have our child more hours and also I would get a break. I envy his ex’s time, space, her time, financial security and everything being sorted re the children.

Sorry for the rant but I’m just wondering if I’m just being a selfish person who can’t see the wood for the tree’s, a post partum emotional wreak….. or valid in my feelings.

Every-time I speak about it, I get so frustrated emotional and angry I come across horrible. I lose my points because I’m so emotionally invested and I feel my child is getting less, I feel I am bottom of the list and I just can’t shift it.

Problems with BD

So throughout this pregnancy we have argued none stop and it's been a lot of him just going out for drinks after work e.g, I don't mind him doing that but it does annoy me when I've been home all day pregnant and I wait for him to come home and he just seems to take the piss and longs it out BC he's enjoying the conversations he's having with people, he ends up saying I'm just jealous and that's why I have a problem which hurts...I just wish in a way like he would want to come home to me? Yesterday we got in probably one of the worst arguments we had, although he was trying to be positive with me and tell me that everything will work out and we'll be okay and work through things, it resulted in me explaining that I feel like I'm losing myself a bit with pregnancy and I'm also worried about the aftermath and not having time to do things for myself (like eat or shower e.g) which he then turns around and says to get over it and many other woman have to do it so I can do it too, I just think he's harsh sometimes with his words and I don't know how to feel towards him sometimes, it did get very heated, he did call me stupid and a spoilt brat but hasn't said sorry since, he even spoke about co-parenting...we are okay atm but I don't think anything really got sorted from this argument apart from it's just me being really negative?? Idk how to feel lol 3/2 weeks to meeting our baby girl too it's just a lot

New here

Hello I'm new here how's everyone

Nursery for working mums

I have 3 under 3 (3, 2 and 8 month old) and am due back to work in January 2027. I work 4 days (mon- thu). My two older children go to nursery half days until 1pm those days and Friday they are home with me. My 8 month old is scheduled to only go in on Mon-Tuesday until 1pm as they don’t have space for him yet so I’m on a wait list for remaining 2 days.

My job is hybrid so we have mandatory days in the office (Mon/tue) and then 2 days wfh, on my wfh days I’ve always just worked at home with my kids here (not disclosed) as my partner would be home to juggle if one of us had meetings. However, given my return to work is looming I’m wondering whether I should put my 8 month old into a different nursery albeit they only offer full days.

Do other mums that work hybrid work at home with their kids at home? Do you disclose it to your work place? Have a flexible working arrangement in place? Just interested in how other mums work?

No judgments please, just the past 3 years I’ve basically had back to back pregnancies so that hasn’t made sense to pay for full days when I was essentially available all the time.