First Birthday

What are people buying their babies for the first birthdays? I have no idea what to buy my daughter 😂 she doesn’t crawl/stand so was thinking of something to help encourage that, but I don’t really know where to start or look. Would prefer some nice wooden toys rather than plastic

in our community

Losing my mind

Now I love my partner I really do but my god he is doing my head in! So recently he has this thing where he keeps accidentally taking things I need to work with him, so far 3 times he’s taken my car keys with him so he’s had to come all the way back to drop them off so he ends up late for work (20 minute drive each way) but today he took my phone to work with him, after he left I was trying to find it as he messages me when he gets to work so I know he gets there all good but I couldn’t find it anywhere and I don’t have a spare working phone or a landline to be able to call it or contact someone to call it for me to find it, about 40 minutes after he left he turns up with it! But he’s just so unorganised when getting sorted for work and his things are just everywhere! I’m just ranting really but has anyone else had this with their partners?

Feeling so down

I’m a single mom, my son is 1.5 yo. I left BD when I was like 3 months pregnant so I pretty much been on my own with this over 2 years now. No family, friends faded away one by one.no partner. Just me. Isolation is killer.

I have been ugly crying for weeks, so angry I can’t control it and I yell at my son for the smallest things then I feel like crap.

Last night sent me in a downhill spiral. A social media influencer just had her 2nd baby, and had an at home wedding. It was so sweet, I hate being jealous truly but after seeing that I can’t keep it together, because I will never have that. She’s so pretty, she has a nice house, family, friends, 2 ,children with a good man. Ya I’m sure it’s not as perfect as it looks and they have issues too. But they have all that . Ya. I guess I am jealous. I don’t have a scale that tips, I have my son of course the only thing I’m thankful for in life but now I have to watch him live the lonely life I lived, and that’s my own personal torture and guilt.

Idk. I just can’t go on anymore, sometimes I feel he is better off without me. I fight so hard to keep the little we have, down to our tiny as apt. By the time I’m finished with work and school I no longer have strangers to be there for him….

Any motivation? Is there really a light at this end of this tunnel. I am so fat and ugky I’m so repulsed by myself, I don’t even want a man anywhere near me out of shame.

I am losing my patience

My bf expects me to be the only one to make cheeses to myself and I am working on my self but when I told him the changes I would like to see in him he said he’s not going to change for anyone and now I feel like nothing is ever going to be eaugh for he diregrades what I do to take care of our son and then complains about what I don’t get around to do and acts like he is the only one doing and taking care of things

Am I wrong for only being attracted to my partner when he’s objectively doing well?

Let me start by saying our relationship has been quite rocky and he’s done a lot of things wrong. I left him multiple times but we’re trying again cuz we’ve got a 1 year old together. We haven’t lived together in almost a full year. Currently he’s on a sober streak and seemingly doing well. My question is am I wrong for not feeling attracted or wanting to be intimate when he’s spent all of his money on bs and can’t afford his responsibilities, if he’s overly complaining about his job and other stuff going on, etc? It just feels very weak to me and I don’t like weak men. If he’s not completely on top of his shit I have very little desire to be with him. Like for instance this man (away for work rn) works 10hr blue collar days okayyy he’s tired I get it but he comes home blows $300 gambling calls me and whines needing to borrow money and asks me KNOWING I DON’T WORK!, whines about how tired he is, and how needy he is and wants to do phone sex but all I can think about is what a little bitch he’s been. Am I expecting too much😩

Do you feel you need a break from your kids?

Life is stressful but my kids I absolutely love spending every minute with. It’s everything else I need a break from (mostly my ex).

Obviously they are only 1&2 I’m sure by the time they are teens and back chatting I will be grateful for a break 😅.

My ex and his family always seem to make the comments. Example I felt pressured to put my 2 year old in nursery so she started last week for 2 mornings and although I know it will do her so much good and she has loved it. However it’s not a break for me. My ex’s mum made a comment yesterday when she came to see them oh I bet it’s been nice just having the one. Well no because now I’m running around early 2 mornings then usually disturbing my youngest for her naps because we have to go get my eldest so really it’s a bit more stress for me 😅. However because she has had the best time it is worth it.

Then when she was leaving they always follow whoever saying bye and she kept going oh look they want to escape the prison and come with nanny. I know she says it joking but I honestly think she thinks we literally sit at home all day every day when we go somewhere pretty much every day. I also know my ex thinks the same (he’s only allowed supervised visits and has never had them on his own) but he said yesterday I don’t want them missing out. I quite often have to bite my tongue as he honestly had no idea what we do every day and they will never miss out on anything trust me. Just because he would rather put his money into other things than his kids that isn’t me.

Ok now I’ve just gone on to a bit of a rant but anyways, do you feel like you need time away from your kids?

Let me know what is appropriate for an excessive babydaddy

He not respecting our privacy nor boundaries.. he wants to talk to the kids daily which is no problem(to me, I left the door open to my abuser) but I’m always busy which daily doesn’t work out for me… we just moved out of the domestic violence situation(I just recently moved out of the house).
I just got a job, yay! Also got another job left and right lol, another yay! Bills didn’t give me a break for just moving in so I ghost bills stacked up because I had nothing but help to get started. My mom left her job to be a stay at home grandma and she spent her left penny to put in for the house to keep my kids warm and pay the land rent, she bought emergency car seats and a van that also broke down…my first check hasn’t came in yet and I’m riding a bike from just outside of the city to again the other end of the same city also just outside of it again by bike!! I don’t have time and am always tired so he is upset I am unable to let him see and talk to our toddlers.. he says he will buy them a tablet so he can see and talk to them daily but.. I told him they don’t even know how to work that and he says well my mom can set it up for them but that would not be her responsibility 🤣 she’s not even going to want to do that because she dislikes him for how he has treated me so no she doesn’t have to do that. Not her problem. That’s my responsibility. I told him I am trying and to give me time to balance out my new life and find solutions for everything.. that he will see them and I am trying but I need to settle down and get it all together for the benefit of the kids. To make sure they are ok… he won’t do the coparent apps although i convinced him so he can send me money because there is no other way… he can’t send me money. I need his help but there is no way. Also there’s only one bank here and the bank we still share.. he out in debt and.. well.. I’m fudged there 🤣. But back to topic… he is being excessive and we were living with him not toooo long ago and I’ve been unable to breathe with him just wanting to do tooo much!!! Also daily is excessive.. I think once a week would be perfect for me but after he posted our kids publicly more than once.. the first he posted our location and the other times he posted our ugly pictures I updated him with.. because I have not been able to take and share nice pictures so now I can’t even trust him because he is not respecting our privacy. What I will do is watermark the pictures otherwise I’m still scared because I don’t want him continuing to disrespect us. If he wants to share to ask me if he can and if I get the chance to get nice pictures not the ugly pictures I send that are not bad but just not good quality because I quickly took them so he* he* can see them because that was the point. Not his girlfriends who I’m protecting my kids from to see because I have a restraining order against her

Let me know what’s appropriate for toddlers and fathers or what has worked for yall!!