What do I do?
I broke up with bf before the baby was born. He never wanted the baby and tried to manipulate me into having an abortion and was very hit and miss with being present up to birth. This didn't bother me but he went around telling everyone I ruined his perfect family and ignore his messages. The only time he messaged me while pregnant was to say how much he loved me and wanted to get back together. This turned into harassment which went as far as messaging my mum and sister who's only 12 sying i'm hormonal and don't know what i'm talking about. He never once asked about his child, if he did I would answer. Since the baby was born he's had minimal contact with the baby and barely asks how he's doing. He hasn't contributed to anything. I've brought everything, gone to all the lessons etc while he hasn't done anything. I just feel at ends wit that i,m getting hammered on social media by his friends and family about how i'm a bad mum for taking away access to his son which I haven't done and how they will make sure he knows what I did when he grows up. It's constant back a forth he says I'm keeping him away from his son but he posts online that he wouldn't be suprised if it was someone elses baby and how he wants to move away but he can't do that anymore because the baby holds him back.
He messages me the week he's nearby and says I'm coming to see him in the next few days when can I come round. I feeling like i'm being made a fool because he knows I won't fight back and I'll give him visitation because I want them to at least tey and have bond.
On top of him doing all this he's trying to start a relationship with someone with children. I feel awful saying this but what makes her children better than the one he's got and has abandened.
I just don't know what to do anymore. Going to court seems extreme but what else can I do?
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Can we get a picture of this douche bag
Court is not always extreme with kids. It sets clear boundaries. If you guys can discuss and agree on terms then it can be a healthy step in learning to coparent with him. If not then the court decides and that can go either way, though I’ve always heard courts favor the mother/main caretaker.
You can keep all the messages, every bit of proof of the real him and seek mediation.its the step before court where a middle man helps resolve conflict/ helps to make fair arrangements and you can pay to make them stand (I don't remember the word) so if either of you go against it it's bad for your overall judgement. From the sounds of your case it probably would go to court where I'm sure he'd question paternity to make you look bad, have to do a DNA test and will have to pay child support
But to be honest with all the social media business I would try get him charged with harassment or anything you could to make him have to stop posting. Whether it's affecting you or not that is wrong and a disgusting way to get people against you and honestly it can be dangerous.
The least you can do is report him on all platforms and they'll at least take the posts down and ban him
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