boring sex life??

my bf is never interested. like if i initiate he’ll go along w it and all but he never initiates. it’s so boring and makes me feel so undesired. yes i’ve communicated this countless of times. no he doesn’t watch porn. i assume he’s attracted to me bc he finishes so quick too so idk what the issue is. he says he’s always tired. but like i guess if that’s seriously the case im still irritated and idk what to do like im obviously not gonna cheat but im so sexually unsatisfied and i wanna feel physical chemistry and passion. it’s highkey not even abt the sex it’s about the chemistry. idk what to do.

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.

Add a comment

You need to talk to him about this more. If previous conversations haven't worked then maybe see a therapist with him. He needs to do some digging to see why he isn't interested and you two need to figure out together how to keep chemistry going. I went from sex 6 times a week to like once a month because right now I have a fissure and a yeast infection and have had lots of facial and sciatic pain with pregnancy. I know my husband misses sex, but he doesn't make me feel bad about it. We still do a lot of cuddling and kissing which keeps me feeling close to him. You also need to do some deep thinking about if this is a deal breaker for you if he doesn't change. I've been in relationships in the past where I didn't feel desired and I'm so glad I got out of them.

If he doesn’t listen or want to try anything. Personally I would just stop initiating and do my own thing when I’m alone. Everybody’s different tho. I could honestly never have sex with another person again and be completely fine. But sex is normal and desired in most peoples lives so I can’t blame you at all for feeling the way you do. But you should talk to him about it seriously. Let him know exactly how you are feeling, don’t hold back even it it’ll hurt him. Don’t make him feel forced but let him know. Then listen to how he feels. It goes deeper than just “being tired” cause I’ve been there but his reason could be completely different.

Honestly I would when you have a moment alone try wearing something revealing and sexy and if that doesnt initiate anything on his end then maybe have a conversation as to why he doesn't feel the need for sex.

My partner doesnt really initiate either and tbh im so ok with that now with a baby haha. Never used to be but now that its gone down to once a month he does initiate more.

Maybe he has a lower sex drive than u or it might be stress or being tired from work. Maybe he might not be feeling sexy. I no when I dont feel sexy sex is something I 100% dont want haha.

Just have a conversation about his needs, how much he likes to and ways he could initiate and when and it should hopefully help.

I feel like men nowa days are so worried about not forcing a woman that they wait for a signal before going for it. But we are definitely the more romantic x

in our community

Hey girl!!

Hey I’m Hannah!! 💕

Looking for a local or long-distance bestie who replies 😂 I’m talking memes, late-night chats, random food cravings, and a little harmless gossip. I’m pretty easygoing, a little sarcastic, and always down for good food and good conversation. Just looking for a real bestie with fun energy 💕

Where are you

Looking for local moms who are truly serious about building genuine, lasting friendships!

I’m based in the North Mississippi area, but I am definitely open to long-distance connections as long as you are willing to remain consistent. We are all grown and lead busy lives, so I’m not looking for someone to text or talk to every second of the day—but I am looking for real effort.

I’m tired of having my time wasted with surface-level small talk that goes nowhere. If you’re ready to put in the work to build a "forever friendship" and want a circle that actually sticks, let’s connect and get to know each other! 🥂✨

Lookin for a bestie

I’m looking for my bestie for life I’m from Tennessee but live in Augusta ga I have two kids one that is 1 and a half (zaiyden) and one that’s 3 weeks old (Elias) idk what to say about my self I have been married for almost 5 years I’m 21 but I’ll be 22 on may 26th I’m a sahm I’m all about my kids please ask any questions regarding me or my kids 🤪

Alright genuinely how do you guys make and keep friends?

I'm so tired of not having any friends... All my old friends don't talk to me after I had kids.. My best friend didn't even invite me to her birthday and she always chooses her other friend over me on my birthday... And everytime I try to make friends on here I get ghosted... I don't know what i'm doing wrong... Everyone in my life always says how kind and caring I am, so why doesnt anyone stick around? I mean I get it that there's stuff going on, people can't always respond that's fine. But people just flat out ghost me never responds again, or I'm the one that constantly has to keep up conversation. I just want a friend that I can talk to and laugh with and have a connection... Idk maybe it's not possible with kids until much later... I feel so alone

In/Out of love?

Does anyone ever see other couples and feel like “wow I can see they’re in love” or you can just see they truly love each other, OR you see couples and thing “that’s how it’s supposed to be” and then when you look at your own relationship its nothing like how other couples appear?

Is it wrong that....I dont really want to have sex with my bf like....4-5 times a day? Or give him bjs all the time? Or that i dont eant to suck him off for 20ish minutes just to make him cum?

I feel like....hes made it a requirement. Even though he doesnt say it...it feels like it because he pays for alot and does alot for me and my daughter even though we dont live together. Idk....is there something wrong with me? I enjoy sex with him but sometimes my girl needs a break just to clean herself ya know? My girl has been sore and and sometimes gets irritated from to much sex but...he doesnt listen sometime and subconsciously makes me feel bad for not wanting to have sex...iv talked with him but...idk....I feel like ik disappointing him.