Please help - long read (sorry)

Hi all, looking for outside views on this as as much as family and friends are helpful, I would like to know what others think of this from their perspective and people who don’t know me/us/our situation.

I’ve been with my husband 4 years and we have a baby together.
During my pregnancy, things were tough, there was many arguments and it was a tough time.
Since we’ve had our baby, I just feel like he is doing hardly anything, everytime I mention it to him or raise it, he bites back.
For example, he has a prolapse disc so he says he’s in pain, therefore he can’t hold our baby for more than 5 minutes. He comes home from work, he needs to lay down and relax as he’s tired. Everytime he is playing with him, he says he needs to go to the toilet or do something and can I have our baby back. He’s never had him alone away from me, as in taken him out. He never just has him because he is his son, it’s constantly me asking him to have him so I can do something. He never offers for me to have some ‘me’ time. He says he is tired from work and when he comes home he wants to chill. He lays in most mornings when he hasn’t got work. I do everything for our baby, he never puts the effort in and takes control.
He says he’s tired and blames it on his prolapse disc. May I add he can game for hours on end in a C shaped position but as soon as it comes to being responsible for our baby, he is in pain.
What would you think about this? I understand he is in pain with his back but surely this isn’t fair or right?
Opinions please ..

in our community

Is this wrong?

My boyfriend and I will fight, if I cry or panic and I go to him because he is still what I consider my safe space at the end of the day. Even though he sucks at comforting me I still give him the benefit of the doubt because of how he grew up. When my boyfriend and I fight if he starts to cry or panic he goes straight to his mom.

He started doing this like 5 minutes ago while arguing and I told him he needs to stop going to his mom and come to me weather we are fighting or not because I am supposed to be his safe space. He kinda just ignored me so I walked away.

Am I wrong? Or is this wrong?

I've had enough.

Has anyone else left their partner after having their first child?

After two years of feeling like a single parent in a marriage (together 8 years, married for 4years.)
I've had enough...

We had a blow up a couple weeks ago where I told him that if things didn't change, I want a divorce.

He has made an effort with somethings, but it doesn't feel like enough. And feels like it's to little to late...

I do all the house work, take care of all the bills minus the mortgage, I take care of the food shopping, childcare arrangements, meals....pretty much all of it as well as working a rotating roster of late and night shifts at work... which I have to drive an hour to get to.

He works 6 days a week.
He has started to do dishes a couple times a week, started to shower a little more often. And had stopped body shaming me... masked as "jokes"...yes, I'm a curvy/heavier set lady... but I'm happy with my body and currently weigh less than I did when I got pregnant.
He used to nag me for sex all the time even though I never wanted it.
I have started to try making the effort to have sex with him more often... but it's difficult when I simply am not interested.

I've come to the realisation that, although I love him as our child's father... I am no longer IN love with him.

I'm scared and sad about it, but I know I have to do something about it....
Please help 🙁🥺

MIL more of a hindrance than a help - what would you do?

My Mother in Law is a lovely woman with such a kind heart and loves her grandchildren so much.

I like her and don’t mind spending time with her (in small doses!).

She is SO loud and has no awareness (can’t read a room) and since having my youngest baby (I have 3 kids) she keeps on assisting on coming over to ‘help’ every Tuesday for the WHOLE day.

But she doesn’t help 🙈 her personality is choatic, she is clumsy and just adds to my stress.
She tries to help bless her but ends up making a mess, it is impossible to get my baby to sleep because she is so loud and doesn’t seem to think it’s a big deal when she wakes the baby.

I have tried in subtle ways to put a stop to it but because I know her intentions are good, I don’t want to offend her.

What would you do?

Curious! SAHM, how much does hubby bring in?

Cause i wanna be sahm but idk if my husbands income is enough

Just roommates

I was hoping that things would get better after a year of postpartum. Giving us a chance to get used to being first-time parents and to a big change in our lives. It just got worse. The emotional and physical distance got worse over time, and it just felt like we were friends. His excuse for not getting physical is that he's afraid that we’ll get pregnant again. Mind you, it took us 10 years to make our first one. We used to cuddle and hold hands all the time. Has anyone gotten out of this funk in their relationship? When did it stop feeling like we are roommates instead of being married couple.

Meal ideas for 9 month old!

Anyone got any good meal ideas they’re doing for their little ones?

I feel like me and my partner tend to have the same meals a lot, mostly pasta dishes and occasionally chicken and mince meat for spaghetti bolognaise.

Little one has lots of different pasta dishes usually like broccoli pasta bake, spinach and pea pasta etc but trying to find other stuff