Feeling invalidated

My son is 18 months and is a serious cheeky monkey stage. I’m a pretty laid back parent unless he’s doing something that could hurt himself or break something I don’t normally intervene (within reason of course). The other day we were visiting his grandma on his dad’s side and he was slamming his toy really hard on her table over and over again. I told him to be gentle and not to slam his toy so he didn’t end up hurting himself or breaking his toy. He obviously kept doing it and every time I’d gently tell him to be careful and to instead roll the toy. My partners mum then said something along the lines of “oh he’s fine leave him be”. My partners also joined in with saying that he was fine playing as he was.

This really has wound me up as it’s not the first time this has happened. Like I say I’m not a super strict mum however he’s still a baby and learning so I’m trying to gently teach him to be careful but whenever I try and parent I feel like I’m made to feel like I’m being over the top.

I don’t really know the purpose of this other than to vent a little and ask what people’s views are? I’ve been struggling with anxiety really bad since having my son so I’m constantly second guessing myself

in our community

What do I do if my kid doesnt tell me the truth about something that happened at school?

So my 7 year old was giving me a hard time this morning. She fought with me all morning with getting ready. She told me when she woke up that she didnt want to go to school. I told her that she has to. So after battling to get her ready. When I sat her down she finally told me she didnt want to go because this boy at school was kicking her at recess. Which I did find out the day before because my mother told me that her and the boy got taken to the principals office for it. She told me that he kept kicking her and she kicked him back (which shes been getting bullied at school and the teachers wont do anything. So I told her its ok to defend herself and fight back). So because of her not wanting to go to school. I told my husband to mention it to her teacher. He didnt tell her everything. So since im trying to take it easy (39 weeks preggo) I messaged the teacher explaining what my daughter told me. Well my mom picks up my kid and brings her home. Proceeds to tell me that the teacher talked to her and told her that the kids play some version of hide and seek tag and they push and kick each other to get them off of eachother. She asked my daughter if the boy was kicking her and she told her no. Her teacher thinks that my daughter is reaching for attention because of the new baby coming because we have been doing a lot of preparations for the baby. She also said that she has noticed that when it gets closer to the end of the year. Kids start to act up because they are restless. Which I get but my daughter has been getting bullied all year. Shes been pushed against the wall. Shes been punched in the stomach. Theres even this one girl that told her that if she put her jacket on that she would get beat up. Which it was snowing that day and when my mom told her to put her hat and jacket on. She said "but im gonna get beat up" hence why I told my daughter if she gets hit, kicked or anything. To fight back and not let them do that to you because everytime she goes to a teacher about it. They say mind your own business or no tattle taleing. Her teacher even told her she HAD to have a parent come to them if something happened. Now tho I dont know what to believe. It explains that when something and she tells me that the teachers dont believe her. Is because she isnt telling the whole truth. She knows I will stick up for her because I was bullied in school. I will not let her feel like no one is on her side. I told her that she needs to be honest with me or I cant stick up for her. All she does is cry and says shes sorry but any time she gets in trouble. The waterworks start. Its just frustrating that she didnt even wanna tell me. She was upset with her Nana because she said something to me. Knowing that her father overheard everything then my daughter pulled him into her room and talked to him. I dont know what was said. Ive yet to discuss it with him because hes on nightshift. I dont know what to do. I know im the more stern parent. I do lose my patience with her because she tends to not listen to me. So I do raise my voice but I tried really hard to catch myself and apologize. Then have a calm talk with her. I just dont understand why she wont be honest. Ive always been her #1 support person. Her guidance. Everything. I need to know what you guys think. What im doing wrong. What im doing right. So I can try and fix it because im about to have another kid and I dont want them to not be honest with me.

Breakfast meltdowns

My one year old is screaming at every breakfast without fail. We're not 100% sure why but we think she doesn't want to eat with a spoon. Has anyone else experienced this and what did you do?
I've been leaning toward BLW because of this which I didn't really want to do but breakfast is hard to do that with porridge etc.
Are there any good recipes for BLW breakfast type foods?
And is there a way to get her to eat with a spoon? Or do I park that issue for now?
Any advice welcome. It is such a bad start to the day right now!

Plane Entertainment

Anyone recommend any good toys/distractions to take on a plane for a 2 year old?! 4hr flight.

Partner troubles

So my partner has never been the most motivated individual. He stays up all hours of the night gaming regardless if he has work the next day or not. If he doesn't need to be anywhere, and I am also at home, he sleeps until late afternoon and leaves me with our 2 year old. When he is awake, he either doom scrolls on his phone, or games in his little corner. Yesterday, i had a long shift at work while he stayed home with our daughter. Now I know it isn't easy staying home with a chaotic toddler, that's why I took her from him the second I got home so he could decompress for a bit. I got a load of laundry on, did some dishes from the night before, cooked our dinner, did bath time, brushed her teeth, put her to bed and went through to her every time she woke up through the night. During bath time, I asked him to clean up the living room and do the rest of the dishes. I come through this morning to nothing been done. He stayed up gaming until 4 or 5 this morning but didn't do the one thing I asked of him. I just feel so disrespected. I figured I had given him plenty of time to chill before I asked him to do the bare minimum. We are expecting our second baby in October. If this is what to expect from him now, what do I need to expect when this one arrives? I just don't know how to get him to realise that I am drowning. It's hard to talk to him about this because he takes everything I say as a personal attack. I just don't know how to navigate this. I guess I'm just ranting really as I don't have anyone to go to.

Lunch ideas for on the go....

I'm running out of ideas for lunches on the go for my 11 month old. For example, we're at a pub for a birthday lunch at the weekend...what would other people take for their baby? I know he can prob have some bits from my plate now..

Marriage

I’ve been married for 4 years now and we’ve been struggling with the same issues. Communication, emotional support, and lacking support overall. I’ve been blessed to have a husband who can financially support us. But when it comes to everything else he’s not there like he should. I feel like I’ve been single and I’m holding up our marriage by the brim. Im not whiling to quit but we have had the same exact fights for 4 years now. It always goes around in a circle. We fight, he comes up with multiple excuses, he gets me a small gift the next day, will fix the issue we were fighting about for a day, then continues doing the same or acting the same from then on out till we fight about it again. Like I feel like I’m raising another kid on top of my 3 and on top of it he’s always complaining about being exhausted from everything he “does” for us. Then asking me to do more for the family like my schedule isn’t already booked. I don’t know where or what to do from here on out.