Am I being too strict for meal time for my little one?

The only thing I'd be quite hesitant about is telling him he has to finish a meal in order to get a dessert - that can teach that you have to force food down even if you're not hungry just to get the "better" or "reward" food.

I would chat to your MIL especially if she's making these sorts of comments in front of your child. She's entitled to feel whatever way she wants about the choices you and your partner have made as parents but she's not entitled to criticise you in front of him, that sets an example. If it happens a lot I'd start by saying her opinion is noted and isn't going to change anyone's mind so you'd rather not hear about it any more. I think grandparents should be able to spoil the kids a bit but they also need to follow reasonable rules especially if they are regular childcare and it's not their business to make important decisions about how to raise them!

I think this is all fair and sets good boundaries for children. I put the responsibility on my son who is 4 and let him know that if he makes a choice not to eat his meal he will be hungry later and there is nothing I can do to help. Either he eats at meal times or there is no more options. The only 'snack' that isn't limited is fruit or veg but he knows he can't eat multiples of the same thing each day. Grandparents seem to come from a generation of thinking that children will starve if you just don't get something into them as soon as but forget we are also teaching them to understand their body, hunger cues and follow family/house rules. Someone has a problem no matter which way you do things