Boundaries with in-laws

Is it okay to ask my husband to set some boundaries around what gets shared with his parents about our family and home life? He talks to his mom for a long time every week and often tells her detailed things about what’s going on with me, our kids, our home, and work. Sometimes it also turns into venting or complaining about the kids or our household, especially when she asks questions that seem to encourage it.

I’m starting to feel uncomfortable with how much of our private life is being discussed, especially because his parents tend to have strong opinions afterward about how we should live or parent. I don’t want to control his relationship with his mom, but I do want to feel like our marriage and family have some privacy and respect. Is it reasonable to ask him to limit certain kinds of complaints or personal details shared with his parents?

in our community

Moms with two or more

I have an almost 3 year old and 1 week old I am not handling it well. I wake up dreading everything. I wish I didn’t have a second I don’t think I can handle it. Does it get better? He’s such a good baby but I just hate that I don’t want anything to do with motherhood. I am so scared when my husband goes back to work in a couple days. Im debating on starting on some medication but I just worry this is just me.

My son‘s broken two TVs

My husband bought a 70 inch TV after my son has broken two TVs😩 we have been so strict about don’t touch the damn TV but now I’m low-key freaking out because that TV is expensive. How do I make sure he doesn’t mess with it?

Nursery or Childminder?

What are people's preference when going back to work?

My little boy will be a year old when I return to work.

I'd much rather a child minder whilst he is still so small but my partner would rather him be placed in a nursery and we just can't come to an agreement on this.

What are everyone's experiences on both and their pros and cons.

Thank you x

Relationship Struggle

This is a rant so bear with me; I feel like I take care of LO totally alone. Husband has started doing more around the house but purely out of necessity as I have baby or work (while caring for baby) 24/7. And also, whenever he complains about how much it is I just am like hello…who used to do all of this? Me! And more honestly. We barely see each other and when we do I am frustrated with him truthfully, which isn’t fair to him but he just is making me so upset. If he does any caretaking for baby it is along side me, not on his own, and is often disregarding whatever I am already doing.

A huge source of contention is sleep. I have done all over nights always - even hospitalized with pp preeclampsia, I denied pain meds to be able to wake for baby. Took them the next day when my sister came. I had begged him during the first month to let me take a short nap daily and take baby - we were both on family leave. Never happened, during second month I begged him to wake up with us in the morning and take baby after feeding so I could nap. Maybe happened twice after huge sleep deprivation driven blow ups on my end. He also TAKES NAPS and without even saying anything to me and it honestly pisses me right off which is maybe crazy but it does. I get so mad when people ask him “how are you sleeping? Good?” And he’s like “oh we are trying” meanwhile he is getting completely uninterrupted sleep. And every time it happens I get super mad and talk to him and he doesn’t understand and says he is just including my perspective and being nice I’m like nice would be recognizing that I have completely removed the burden of waking at night from you actually not insinuating that night feeds have you tired for some reason. Baby is sleeping much longer now as we approach 3 months so I am not so tired anymore but it is not due to ANY sleep support from him.

Maybe I’m crazy. I don’t even know anymore. RIP my mental stability atp.

Parks. Germs.

Did you all avoid parks until a certain age due to germs etc.
So for example my 1 YO puts her hands in her mouth all the time but LOVES going to the park.
I do know someone whos children got hands foot and mouth disease.

So with all that in mind should I just wait to take her to public parks until shes old enough to understand not to put her hands in her mouth??.
First time mom. So please share some helpful advice.
Im also ordering her a playset swing and slide for our personal backyard.

Would you be mad?

Not sure if I’m overreacting but I can’t help but be mad. Here’s the backstory my partner has a semi no-contact relationship with his mum and by that I mean he doesn’t respond or even talk to her and the majority of their interactions go through me (which I never asked for or agreed too). We have a 5 month old son who she’s only ever met 3 times and barely asks about him but expects us to keep her updated. Like most new parents we’re living month to month and finances are quite tight at the moment with me being out of work and on MAT leave. Well my MIL has asked me today if I can ask my partner, her son if he can send her money/contribute towards a vet bill for one of her cats. The reason I’m mad is because she only ever reaches out when it’s to ask for money and today she asked to call to FaceTime with my son but didnt hesitate once I’d accepted to put me in the awkward position of asking for money not to actually interact with her grandson. She came across quite passive aggressive about it stating that he should help her because “it’s technically his cat” - this was a cat she adopted when he was A CHILD. This vet bill is supposedly over £700 so I don’t know where she thinks we’re going to pull money from? I appreciate we’re all struggling but I really don’t think this is our problem…. Not only this but she messaged him about this and he ghosted her (which she also complained to me about) but I feel like if he didnt respond to your message at the time clearly that’s your answer… so why am I now being put in the awkward position to ask him again? When it has nothing to do with me.. and my priority is my son?. Idk would you be mad? The other thing is I know that the more she keeps begging and pestering him the more he’s willing to give her what she wants just to shut her up because he just wants an easy life and never stands up to her which also makes me mad because if we had the means to help her I’d be happy to but I know we don’t and this means it’ll be affecting how we care for our son which just has me riled up.