What do you think?
My spouse and I are very wealthy. Like retire today kinda wealthy and never work again. My husband works just to pay our bills for now but we are set for life whenever we want to tap into that money. My cousin says we are ridiculous for how we choose to live. We drive 1 car, we don’t eat out (I love to cook and it’s healthier for our fam), and we generally entertain our kids outside on the trail and park. We have worn the same clothes for the past 5-10 years. We just aren’t shopping kind of people. Are we ridiculous. If I’m being honest, our net worth is 3 million (cash, investments and property values today, no debt). Is it ridiculous we don’t buy stuff ? My cousin says we live like bums and he finds it ridiculous that we work and bring an income in from our rental properties. We also donate a lot of our money and buy nice gifts for others.
Just packed my bags. Now I don’t know where to go… did I over react?
My husband and I had the best relationship ever when we first started dating, but then some thing happened that made him depressed along with some other mental health concerns, and he got really heavy into drinking and became an alcoholic. We hit some of our lowest point, and he became abusive a few times, and finally after one really bad night, he agreed to get sober. He went to rehab/AA, and he came back the man I loved again. Things were great for few years. We had our baby, bought a house, and built a life. Then he relapsed one night, and that was all it took. That same night he got into a bad accident that left him permanently disabled. Life got way worse for us at that point, but I stood by him and he promised never to drink again, and I told him if he drank even one drop, I would take the kids and leave him.
Tonight I came home from work, and he home with our female neighbor and her kids, and they were both drinking. Empty bottles lined the counter, and they were drinking different things, so I knew how many he had, and it was a lot. I asked if she brought them over (she did. I don’t know why or why she was even there). But I didn’t say a word and just went back to our bedroom and started packing a bag. He didn’t say anything and stayed in the kitchen with her chatting, mainly because I don’t think he realized I was packing. When I came back out, I was crying and carrying bags, and this girl made no effort to move out of my or leave our home. She just sat there all cocky while I packed everything. When ge noticed I was packing, his face kind of dropped and his eyes looked sad and he said “are you really leaving?” And I said yes. I told our kid to put their shoes on, and said we were just leaving for a while, and they asked to stay but he told them to listen to me because mom is boss, and gave them a big hug. Once they were in the car, he was on the porch with this girl now, and I looked at him and said “you’re not going even going to pretend to stop me?” At this point his best friend pulls up and immediately realized we were fighting. I like this friend, and I do respect him, so I hated that at this point my husband was making me look crazy in front of him and this girl, and just laughing like I didn’t matter. I told him if he left with his friend then I would be delivering him divorce papers, and it would be more than a brief separation. He got in the car and left anyways, leaving me with this lady and her kids. I locked the front door, got in my car and left. I don’t actually have anywhere to go, but I feel like I can’t go back. The whole situation was horrible, and I’m scared if I put my tail between my legs and return, he’ll think he can do anything. He did privately message me and said he drank because his mind was taking him to a dark place, but I told him I didn’t want to hear it. He knew the rule, and then on top of it he lied about both drinking in the firsts place and about spending time with this lady. Apparently they’ve been hanging out every day, and her kids have a weird relationship with him too. His relationship with this woman is not sexual, but all emotional. I guess she’s unemployed, and he can’t work because of his disability, so when I take our kid to school and go to work, she comes over with her kids and they play happy family during the day, which is fucking weird. Like mini trips together and hanging out at the house and stuff.
I’m so disgusted and angry right now, but as I start to calm down and the realization that I have no where to go sinks in, I’m starting to feel like I acted to rash.
In-law issues (long one sorry)
I’ve never felt welcomed by my in-laws, in fact my father in law called me “favor of the month” one of the first times I met him. He is the type of guy you can not disagree with/ have a different opinion or he will shut down. Which I do disagree with him 99% of the time because I’m going to have my own opinion. She is sheltered and goes along with whatever her husband says. Fast forward my husband and I have been together 10 years, married for almost 6 and have two kids together. I haven’t seen my in-laws since end of January 2025. I sent the invitation for my daughter’s 3rd birthday in May of ‘25 and they said no, I invited them to my son’s first birthday October of ‘25, they said they can’t come. I invited them to Christmas at our house, they said no because their dog has anxiety and can’t be left alone for that long. My husband invited them for dinner in January of ‘26, they declined cuz of the dog. Christmas was my last straw and I no longer want them involved in my or my children’s life because they make no effort and I don’t need people in and out of my kids life’s.
My husband was on the phone with his dad today and he said “I hope she figures out those walls that she has put up, MY grandkids don’t even know us” IM SHOCKED. WTF
My family says I need to keep reaching out because “birthday and holidays invites are bare minimum” but I’m over it and I’m over being mistreated.
