Babysitting

Are you comfortable hiring a babysitter? I don’t have any family around and my husband is comfortable letting his family watch our child but I’m not comfortable with it at all because there have been so many issues with them treating me weird in the past 12 years that I don’t want to rely on them at all. he’s been so against a babysitter because he says he doesn’t want someone randomly watching our toddler and I get that but iv expressed to him that I’m not comfortable asking my in-laws to watch them as well but he forcing it on me so iv had to leave my child with his mom to go to ultrasound appointments. Now iv had to cancel my appointment tomorrow because he assumed his mom could watch her but she has other plans because he asked last minute and it makes me rethink just hiring a babysitter because iv never wanted to leave my child with her to begin with but it was free childcare. He’s also suggested leaving the child with his sister and I said absolutely not doing that, for 1)me and the sister have had so many issues in the past and 2) she would never ask us to watch her child so why would I ask her to watch mine? and he was like well that’s her problem if she wouldn’t ask us for help but if she wants to watch ours he doesn’t have a problem with that. His family and I are just starting to rebuild a relationship after I want no contact with them for a year and he’s just so open for them to watch our child because he wants us all to get along and have a relationship. I feel like after 12 years if things were ment to be different they would be and they genuinely apologized to me and cried and asked for forgiveness but I feel like I’ll always have my guard up.. idk maybe I’m the issue atp but I’ll never be comfortable with certain things.

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I was worried about getting a sitter for a while, but we have a wedding to go to next month and no family that is able to watch that isn't already going to the wedding. I also want some me time in the future. I hired someone from care (.) com and I'll see how it goes 😊

I used to be a babysitter for lots of families and a nanny for one for 4 years. I remind myself there are people out there like me who love kids and want to help adults get out.

Has his relatives bonded and developed a healthy strong attachment to the child? If not id look for a drop in daycare. They have day cares that do drop in rates where u drop the child off for as long as you want. You can also may use Nextdoor app to ask your neighbors and other mothers for suggestions. https://nextdoor.com/!FF3HWL

If you don't mind private messaging me on here so I don't forget to tell you haha. But it will be on the 20th, so if you don't hear about it from me for a while, that's why.

Also, we have cameras all throughout our house, so that helps

Why can't you take your baby with you?

in our community

What to do

I really hate this about myself but when my toddler does things like throwing water out the bath, wriggling away when I'm trying to put his nappy on, repeating things over and over when I've said no, I get a sudden anger bubble up in me. I've never acted on the anger but I have to try my absolute best and I really wish it wasn't there. I don't even want him to sense that in me as we have such a loving relationship 😔
I'm being assessed for ADHD/autism and I'm not sure if this plays a part but I'd really love to find a way to stop these feelings in the moment.

Sad and frustrated!

I truly hate what bio mom did to the baby I have. I adopted him months ago and it hurts me because he was born a drug baby so he does have delays and that shouldn’t be on him. He’s had a couple surgeries already and he’s going to have a couple more soon and it breaks my heart everyday knowing that she did him so dirty and continued after he was born until CPS took him away😩. But I know deep down having him he’s going to have the greatest life of all! Every morning when he wakes up he’s so happy to see me and that fills my heart with joy. Even thou he has delays he’s doing so much better in my care, he’s starting to crawl even thou he’s over a year old now. He’s 17 months to be exact. But he’s doing great and that’s all that matters. Right? Sometimes I feel like I could be doing more for him but what else could I possibly do?

Identity crisis?

Is anyone else struggling with their identity? I have a toddler and a 2 month old and I’m a sahm. I realized today that I don’t do anything except for mom. I used to bake and go to the gym and be a person but I can’t even remember the last time I baked or even stepped foot in a gym. I love my kids but I feel like I’m not me anymore. My husband is also military so with him being gone and no “village” it just seems impossible to do anything for me.

Food catcher

Does anyone use one of those food catcher things that go around the high chair and is supposed to catch the food they throw overboard?
If so, which one do you use please?
I’ve seen a ‘catchy’ brand but it doesn’t look wide enough and my boy seems to have the throwing capabilities of a cricketer!
Basically I’m just reeeeeally tired of spending more time cleaning the floor and chair, than I do feeding him. 🫠