HELP with boundaries from grandparents!!

Hey guys, I could really use some advice. My mum has done so much for me and my husband since our first baby was born. I’m an only child, and she’s been incredibly generous – she’s bought our little boy so many things, helped us financially, and during those first three months she was coming over almost every day or every other day. At the beginning, I genuinely needed and appreciated the help. She’d help with the housework or have my baby boy so I could catch up on some sleep.

Now that we’ve settled into more of a routine, I don’t need as much help as I did before. I’ve realised that I really enjoy the couple of hours I get to spend with just me and my baby boy while my husband is working from home and then out at his evening job. I want to enjoy that one-on-one time with him and build our own little routine as a family.

The difficult part is that my mum is also going through a lot at the moment. Her husband (not my dad) has an incurable brain tumour, so I know having us and her grandson around brings her comfort and happiness. Because of that, I feel even more guilty about wanting a bit more space and independence.

I don’t know how to tell her without upsetting her. I know everything she’s done has come from a place of love, and I’m so grateful for all of her support. But I can also see that my husband is starting to get a bit frustrated with how often she comes round. Has anyone been in a similar situation? How did you set boundaries kindly without hurting your mum’s feelings?

in our community

Nursery funding question

I have a 2yo currently at nursery and we’ve got the 30hours working parents hours and in August my youngest will start who will also get the 30 hours. I also use the tax free childcare.
However, my partner is starting university full time and has been told student finance can help with up to 85% of nursery fees, how does this work if I’m working and have the childcare etc in my name? Or are we best to just keep it how it is? Has anyone been in this situation before? It’s confusing enough without confusing it more 😵‍💫😅

Joking around

It seems like my husband is making jabs at me disguised as jokes. And he will
do it in front of other people.
When I confront him and tell him that the jokes he's making doesn't come across as funny to me he basically just thinks I'm being sensitive. It almost seems like resentment coming out in "joke" form, but no one laughs and it just tears me down and leaves me feeling uncomfortable. Idk if it's just me... maybe I am sensitive and just can't take a joke. He literally said that he isn't going to joke around with me anymore. Which I don't understand because me and my husband can joke around and have laughing fits but there are just some things that I just don't find very funny and I actually find insulting.

His response to me bringing it up makes me question myself a lot and if I shouldn't get so offended and if I should be more accepting of these jokes even though they might feel like jabs maybe I'm just overly sensitive.

I'm not sure how I should handle this.

Childcare funded hours

Can someone please help break this down to me 🫠 qualified for the funded hours spread out so roughly 22 per week. Also can have tax-free childcare. But how does it work? He starts in September and I don’t really find the nursery helpful at all 😬 if anyone could just give an example of what it looks like for them would be great!! (My brain doesn’t seem to want to work haha)

Make me feel less anxious 😅

So I’m 7 Months PP, my husband & I just bought our first home & paid off all of my other debt. We are in a very good place in our relationship & went away a few weeks ago… & well on thing lead to another and he didn’t pull out (I’m on the patch for context but we don’t use protection). We’ve had a cold for the last week & I’ve been feeling super sick to my stomach but my husband says he is to.

I did take a test (period is due next week) & it was negative but I know it would be too early (my husband was bugging me 😂). He makes alot of “jokes” but not jokes about me being a stay at home mom, it’s something we both want. However ‘stay at home’ would mean work 2 nights a week & every other Saturday most likely (we both feel i should never completely not work. We have been chatting recently about if I am pregnant & what that would look like (not working until both kids are in school)

WELL. We are both very anxious about the possibility of me being pregnant, I feel like it’s unlikely because we’ve struggled with fertility issues in the past but like it only takes one time 😅.

For context my husband & I are open to the idea of another baby, we both would prefer a 3-4 year age gap & also would love to have another when I would actually have enough hours for maternity leave again. My work is very accommodating so I’m not concerned about that. I guess just any advice or well wishes would help 🤍 thank you

Am I wrong?

My 13 year old niece is awake. I asked her around 4:30am why she’s awake & around 5:30am she replied “Playing with friends.” I ask “Playing what with friends?! 👀 I love you, be good.” Am I wrong to be concerned? She lives with her dad’s girlfriend currently, but used to live with her paternal aunt, who was lazy and careless and irresponsible. Her dad is often out of state for work and her mom has always put drugs, alcohol and questionable men before her own kids. Her main guardians have been my MIL, her paternal aunt and now her dad’s girlfriend of maybe 8 months. I know it’s summertime, but am I wrong for thinking she should be responsible and asleep at this hour?

Sad and miserable

Well im a single mom. I was just told by his pediatrician that he needs so probiotics in his diet. His medicaid will not pay for it. I dont get paid until 26th and im sad cause I have Noone to help me get some baby probiotics drops. I dont know what to do. I know part of this is PPD but I cant help feeling like im failing I cant get a job cause of my disability. Im about to give up on everything... advice please and thank you