Struggles with Partner

Hey, just looking for a bit of advice really as I don’t have many friends to talk to.

My partner and I have a 15 month old and 3 months pregnant with our second he opened a business around the time our son was born that requires a lot of his time and attention.

To cut a long story short, he rarely has our son alone, he only really spends time with him at night before he goes to bed/some time on the weekend, but I am expected to be fully responsible during those times. There are some weeks that he hasn’t even changed our son’s nappy once. If I ever have an appointment/social event I have to arrange childcare or plan around our son’s nursery hours.

He doesn’t do much in the house at all, but I’m fine with that as I don’t have set working hours due to helping with the business so I spend a lot of time at home.

The issue I have is that I am expected to care for the home, care for our son (who sleeps absolutely terribly), and help with the business daily. Whilst I have allowed him to focus solely on the business.

It feels like I am being stretched to do more, and he can be very hurtful with the way that he speaks to me. Sometimes I think I’d be better off doing it alone as honestly it feels that way sometimes now.

Just looking for some advice really or anyone who has been through something similar? 😞

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I’m in the exact same position, i have to do everything in regards to the children (9mo and 2yo) and the house. He says he works full time 😅 I feel like a single parent tbh. I have no other help from parents or anything and I feel at breaking point 🤦🏻‍♀️ to make it worse they both have hand foot and mouth atm too 😵‍💫

Can I please offer you both a bit of advice: (the poster and the top
Comment)

He might be working extremely hard to build a better future for you as a family… HOWEVER, PLEASE don’t become financially dependant on your partners. You don’t know what the future holds, ever. Whether you separate, someone’s health declines, the business goes bust, you just never know.

I started a travel business during maternity leave with my first and I’ve become friends with a lovely lady in her 50s who spent her life building a business WITH her husband. But now they’re likely to separate, something she never saw coming, and the business is technically his business in his name. It’s not something she ever anticipated when she was building it with him, and now she’s gotta start from scratch.

Make sure you build something for yourselves xxx

One of my fave YouTube channels that often deals with tough convos with your partner! It’s called the - dr John delony show - def check it out

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Yes I’ve brought this up to him and he says he gets it and does his best to give me that time but after a couple days it feels like it goes right back and I’ve pretty much trauma driven myself to believe that since I haven’t been keeping up with the house work I don’t deserve time to myself which is not his fault in the slightest I always choose to keep the baby while I watch tv and make dinner so he can have his de-stress time but I tend to let myself fall to the waist side and keep pushing past it till I cry to him at midnight about how much I’m struggling.

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