How am I ever supposed to do this alone?

Im so sick and tired of being alone. I actually started crying while I was supposed to be enjoying time with my husband and kids because of how lonely I feel.
I found out today everyone on my mom's side of the family was up doing a memorial service for my maternal grandparents and all spending time at the family camp i haven't been to in at least 8 years. No one bothered to tell me, no one bothered to invite me.. but my supposedly best friend was invited.. but not me..
Then at the festival I was at today, I was looking around seeing mom friends meeting up, hugging while their husbands shook hands, their kids played, and they were talking catching up. And i was standing alone with my baby while my husband was in line with our kids. That's when I started fighting back tears.
It hit me like a brick how fucking lonely I am. Ive tried reaching out so many times for so many years and get blown off, ghosted, and filled with false promises of future hangouts. The worst part is, both of our families live within 30 minutes of us. I have been raising our kids by myself while my husband is working for over 5 years now. No calls, no texts, no one checking in, no one asking to visit me or the kids. Family only want to be around when my husband is here.. whats so fucking wrong with me that everyone would rather act like I dont exist..? Why do my kids also have to pay the price for that.. they always ask about seeing people, but i dont know what to say to them because everyone is always "too busy". Why does no one give a literal fuck about me? The deep hatred and resentment I have built towards absolutely everyone around me is insane.
I just want some resemblance of a village.. friends and family who want to be around me and my kids.. i want to stop feeling like we're too much so theyd rather not have us around.. i get 3 boys can be a lot, but like.. i dont know.
I just dont want to feel so fucking alone anymore. Im always in such a bad mood, im constantly overwhelmed, I feel like i need a break because im constantly taking care of my kids 24/7, i feel like im failing them because I barely have the patience most days to be the mom they deserve. I hate this. I hate everyone.

in our community

Wake & Bake

Anyone up to text?

Gonna give this another try

Heyy! My name is Marie, I’m 24 and a ftm to an 8 month old baby boy. I struggle making friends and keeping them. Keeping them is my hardest issue because I’ll talk to you for a few days but then life gets busy and I completely forget to respond until I suddenly remember 🥲. I am inconsistent at times, but I am a good friend and a great listener. So… if you don’t mind me not texting everyday, let’s be friends🫶🏽
*pic of me and my boy when we went on vacation for his 7 months🥰*

What would you do if your fiance the father of your 2 year old went out last night saying he’d be home at 12:30am instead come home at 9am…. Keep reading

So his phone died (this wasn’t a lie his phone is kinda broken and doesn’t charge well) so he had zero communication with me form 10pm to 9am so he didn’t tell me he was going these places as he should.

He proceeds to go to the club with his friend who is also a father and husband then to frat party and got really drunk and fell asleep on the couch with his friend at the frat party…
I know he didn’t cheat becauae they both are loyal but it’s the part where he didn’t tell me he was going to 2 places a man should let his fiance know he’s going because there will be drunk females at both and just out of plain respect…

He came back at 9am acting normal like what he did wasn’t absurd and crazy he claimed he avoided females but he was just out having a good time and got carried away

keep in mind he’s 25 his friend is 30
But FALLING ASLEEP at a frat house while you are married with a baby at home is wild work at am I overreacting for being so concerned disrespected and mad????

Keep in mind he’s not a cheater nor is his friend so their purpose wasn’t to go out and cheat but I feel weird because if you are that drunk how can you know what exactly went down I mean he fell asleep there that’s the part that really buggs me I’m just so upset I was unaware of all of this until 10am

He’s never done this before he’s never cheated and never not communicated while out he also only goes out with that friend maybe twice a month and it’s not to a frat party or club so I’m highly confused and concerned he doesn’t understand that even tho it was once that exactly what raises my concern even more I DIDNT EXPECT HIM TO NOT TELL ME HE WAS SLEEPING AT A FRAT HOUSE he left me worried all night and I’m the bad person for screaming at him because I’m feeling diminished…

Friendship advice.

I want to write a post about my closest friend who’s got the hump due to having a registry whilst I’m on holiday told me 2 months before the date when I had booked my holiday 2 months before her even considering or mentioning having a registry told me I should be there for her because she’s been there for me and I should either cancel or change my dates baring in mind I have 2 year old and a 3 month old and unable to change dates. For my wedding she left me on the day of my wedding at the hotel to meet a man she was dating then ( who she isn’t marrying) then attended the evening however I had paid for the hotel and was planning for her to get ready with me and help me with my photos etc she also made an issue on my hen because she was over 1 hour late and expected me and everyone else to wait for her and not go through to duty free didn’t help me during my wedding at all but I just accept her for who she is as I know she’s selfish however I’m very pissed off for her to throw in my face that I should give what she gave me. Am I a horrible friend?

I’m bored..wanna chat shit?

I’ve had a couple glasses of wine…everyone’s gone bed and I’m bored! Just need to talk, to someone? Anyone?!

Incredibly sexually frustrated.. rant

So the past several weeks I've had a really hard time finishing during sex, ill get close then be hit with a very painful contraction making it so I don't finish, and if I try to finish after the contraction passes I just get hit with another more painful one, again making me not finish. I use to love having sex with my hubby but now every time im horny or he's horny I just get sad because I know I either have to have a lot of physical pain to finish or I don't get to. Last night I initiated sex but after the third time of trying to finish I ended up just laying on my husband crying while he tried his best to comfort me. Im so sick of it, I want this kid out of me already and I want to be able to enjoy sleeping with my hubby again and not cry after 😭😭😭

(Also just to clarify, I dont just want him out so I can enjoy sex again. Im very excited to meet him, and we love him very much already. I don't want anyone taking what I said the wrong way lol)