Feeling defeated

That must be hard to navigate sometimes! You haven't listed many examples but the ones here seem like they should be fixable? I think the soap is a non issue personally. I also agree that there's no reason the boy should be the one to mow the grass simply because of his gender. But he should contribute in an age appropriate way to the household in the same way the girls do. So maybe one week one of the girls mows and he does some laundry 🤷🏼‍♀️ With the overreacting from your partner, idk I know you've said it's hard to describe. But if he's shouting and raging and treating them differently that is definitely a really big problem and needs to be addressed. He can't get away with saying it's sexist to make the boy do the mowing whilst also saying "he's a boy" to excuse behaviour. I'm assuming there's a lot worse than not using shampoo! I would try to have a sit down with your partner when things are calm, discuss the issues and try to get on the same page so you can have a united front with the kids!

Let the grass get long then. F that. He ain’t about to teach your daughters how to mow a lawn when his son is the oldest and a boy. He doesn’t get to try to parents your kids when you can’t parent his. What’s the point of being married if he’s treating u like u a new girlfriend who has no authority. If that boy is coming to stay both of yalls house then he can damn sure participate. And as a woman we teach our daughter things as well to help around the house. Your husband needs to realize that both of you live there, both of you have kids together, and both of you are parents. He is showing division in your family by letting his son off the hook and treating u like u don’t have a say. Let him know from now on that he isn’t to parents your daughters in any way. It is honestly sad he sees yalls kids as separate. He may not biologically be their father but he is a father figure. And you are a mother figure to his son. This is weird and irritating girl. Sorry I going through that bull