Husband & MIL
Can someone please tell me if this was rude. I don't feel like this a huge let me get divorce situation but I also know progressively it will bother me more. My MIL at the beginning was always being rude to my husband and giving me back handed comments; she noticed that her "help" was not needed as much as she thought, she's used to being needed when it comes to caring for babies in her family bc the parents lack basic parenting. Now she's always on my husbands business, 5 years in and I'm noticing my husband has mommy issues. His mom was very manipulative and was present but not hands on with them. Long story short she was rude to
Now to the message:
I discussed to my husband that when my child goes over to his parents or my parents; he's there so his grandparents can enjoy his company not for them to take care of him. Why did I say this? Because I noticed that both parties lack patience. So why would I put my child in uncomfortable situation, they're not bad grandparents but if you didn't parent your own children how can you do it with a grandchild, my husband knew that I work really hard for my son to not have screen time. Well, his grandma gave him the iPad before bed, my son comes home with dad the next day a complete feral child crying to watch something on the TV. I asked him if he has screen time with grandma and he said yes. He shared dad fell asleep and he slept with grandma and grandpa. I also shared with my husband that I don't like that. I don't want my child sleeping with anyone. My husband shares that my mil asked when he was going to visit____, another state. idk what she's thinking but we're not in financial place to be traveling, but that's non of her business. Not only that my husband cannot watch our kid all day and night. Like hell need some screen time. Literally, it takes a lot to not have screen time. Not only that but I have noticed that he allows our kid to walk behind him I parking lots, doesn't pack his essentials properly like water bottles etc. so why would I be okay with him taking our kid to another state with my MIL. Also, my mil gave my son gum, and when he was a young toddler they almost gave him peanuts like that little seed snacks.
Considering how pushy she is I messaged her and said the following, I also told her she's more than welcome to take my husband to her trip since my husband wants to be baby by her at his grown age and she wants to do what she didn't want to do before;
3 kids & confused lol
So I have 2 toddlers & a baby
3.5 years, 1.9 years and a 5 month old.
I’m just questioning if I’m failing or if this is normal.
I’m having a hard time keeping things organized. Laundry is a constant. Washing, folding, putting away. Am I the only one that is struggling having the time to keep things organized and put away? I try so hard to keep tank tops, short sleeves, long sleeves, play clothes put away in the exact spot. All that with 10 mins in between feeding and crying and just having to console, break up an argument about a toy and feeding my infant. Is this normal or am I behind??
Frustrated with husband
Needing to vent.
My husband is a teacher and is home for the summer. It sounds like it would be nice and I’d have help and to some extent it is but in other ways it’s way more frustrating because 1. He is a clean freak. When it was just me. We’d be messy and just clean up before he got home. But now we clean more often during the day and it’s just more work. 2. He has it in his mind that it’s summer vacation and he wants to do all this free time stuff….. we both take time having our kid and the other having a bit away from him. However, in my time away from him I’m doing chores, and in my husbands time away he does his hobby. We’ve talked about it and he says well just use your free time how you want. That sounds nice but if I did that we would have no food, clothes, and the house would be a mess.
He then says how much stuff he does around the house, and he’s not technically wrong but he doesn’t realize some of it I do as well (so he’s doing 1/2 of that) and that most of his stuff is once a week or every other week or even less often. Mine is mostly daily and multiple times a day.
We are going to talk again after baby goes to bed but it’s so frustrating. And actually I haven’t minded for the most part. But today he came in and was frustrated bc he “had the baby so much more than me”….. he had him 30 minutes more and they’ve watched tv/he’s been on his phone the whole time and half of his time was baby napping on him. Meanwhile all of my time with baby he was awake and crazy, I fed him all his meals, took him outside twice where he got super dirty and I had to wash him off, read books and kept him away from tv.
I just don’t know how to get my husband to understand it’s not the same. Not only that. My kid plays alone or is calm with my husband and cries and whines and clings onto me. We just have such different experiences
