So my little brother is getting married. No children are allowed at the wedding. My baby will be 11 months old. I exclusively breastfeed. The wedding is an hour away and starts at 2:30pm.
The wedding is a small, intimate family gathering.
My brother has offered for his friend (a nursery worker) to look after the 3 children (ranging from 11 months to 3.5 years) in his apartment whilst the wedding is happening.
My husband says “no, this will absolutely not be happening, I will be looking after our child”
My husband said he will miss the wedding and look after our dog and baby. I asked that we could book a hotel room in the city for that night so that I could back to our baby as soon as possible (7-7:30pm). And my husband said “no, we are not staying in that sh@tholee city overnight when we could be at home”.
I think he is being ridiculous. I want to attend my brother’s wedding. I want to stay in a hotel in that city so we can all relax and have a good time.
For context the city is not a sh”thole and is quite popular in the UK. My baby will be without me for 6 hours or so. He will be starting nursery a week later.
Is my husband being unreasonable?
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Yours husband sounds like he has some sort of prior vendetta here because woooahhh there my guy. I understand being cautious about a random person, watching the kids, sure okay. But the rest? Seems aggressive for no reason and mildly irrational as you’ve said it’s not a shithole and he’s being quite rude about a pretty large family milestone and how to make it a comfortable affair for all involved. He could’ve easily been nice about it, but this comes off.. ehhh
For more context we are travelling 4 hours to his cousin’s wedding 1 month later. But the baby is invited to that.

I don’t see the problem. Your husband has offered to look after baby so you can enjoy your brother’s wedding. I wouldn’t want someone else looking after my baby, especially if there’s going to be older toddlers there. It’s up to him where he wants to stay with baby, if he wants the comfort of his own home, what’s the issue. Have a nice day at your brothers wedding, babies safe with his dad, you don’t need to worry so much.

I’d be curious to understand what’s driving his reaction? Because the wedding could be a great occasion to spend time the two of you, with your baby looked after by a competent person (even though I’m not super fan of the no children allowed stuff in general). If it’s just the babysitter and leaving your baby with someone he doesn’t know, then him staying with your baby while you attend seems like a good compromise. But refusing the hotel is a bit harden to understand, because it’s your little brother we’re talking about and it would be much better for breastfeeding. It doesn’t sound super fun to stay in a hotel when you can be at home sure, but if he doesn’t want your baby to stay with a babysitter that sounds like a good compromise if he really wanted to be supportive

Which city is the "shithole" because I feel like if he wanted to he could plan himself a great itinerary and actually enjoy the weekend?
I totally get not wanting to leave your baby with a stranger, I'd be the same. Your husband could be flexible in other ways though, like staying nearby!

Is Bristol a shithole???? I thought it was supposed to be lovely. There is no helping some people!