mourning pre kids era

anyone else mourning and missing their life before they had kids? I love my baby so much but i’m already 11 months pp and this feeling has never left. I miss who i was so bad, i miss my old body, i miss being in school and i miss going out with my friends. I miss being free, I miss seeing other people, I miss not having so many responsibilities. This has been so hard. I feel like no part of my old life will ever be the same, i feel trapped, and i feel like i shouldn’t complain because i have a healthy baby and an amazing husband. Why why why am i feeling so sad and miserable and why can’t i just accept my current life without constantly thinking about what could’ve been?

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I think all of us mothers have our moments and our seasons of hardship. I personally think to be happy in motherhood it really requires a balance and blend of support from outsiders like friends, family, daycare, and partner. And if u dont have that… strong communication and understanding with a partner. Do you get time to decompress? Do you get alone time? How are things with partner support? Any friends or family taking the kids? Are you making time for your friendships, relationships, hobbies, and self development?
If you havent… take some time and watch mom routines and mothers share their stories. For me it been hellpful… from house organization, cleaning, self care, self development, post partum care and just hearing and sharing with others who are in the same boat. Mommyhood is a blend of complexities and rhythms and u will find yours! They say some women can taken up to 5 years after giving birth to find their new normal! Kids are tons of work!

My youngest is 4.5 & I often mourn my life before kids. I think most of us, do. My kids will both be in school starting next month, so I’m hoping to finally get back to me. Hang in there, mama. It does get easier.

in our community

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A childhood friend offered to send me $100 because he knows I’m going through a tough time. I’ve never been offered money before and have never asked anyone to borrow money. I don’t even know how to answer yes. It feels so weird. We only speak through Instagram so I don’t think he still has my number.

Do I reply with my phone number and say “you can send it through Zelle or Apple Pay” — that sounds so crazy to me.

Someone please help!

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I feel terrible but I find it difficult to be with my baby all the time. I just feel like I need time away from her sometimes. Apart from my husband I have no one else around to help with the baby.

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