Housework and kids

Would love to know some opinions.

I was with a mum friend and she made a comment (wasn’t to be mean or offend me) but it did make me think.
We were talking about cleaning/housework and saying how having kids and keeping up with the house was hard. I then said I clean as I go, l spend 10 mins after meal times cleaning or I’ll let my little one have some free play while I put washing on or away, hoovering ect.

She was really taken aback and said oh no she lets it build during the day and then once her kids are in bed then cleans, tidies and gets all the jobs done. She thinks that doing it while they are awake is taking time away from the kids and being with them.

I’m really interested to know what people think and what you do? Because I feel a bit guilty now maybe In looking at the housework all wrong? But for me personally I can’t sit with mess all around me it makes me feel suffocated.

in our community

Husband and help

This week I have been cleaning non stop I love to have my baby in a home where it’s clean especially where she plays etc our living room is always clean bc of ME! My husband works and when he comes home I’m still cleaning, I clean the kitchen and the cat room, I’m taking care of our 10 month old daughter all day while I do this. He comes home I had dinner ready we ate, I’ve changed our baby gave her a bath today and diapers, I cleaned the kitchen while my husband played with our baby, mind you she can be with both of us, I desperately thought “ I wish he would say that he would clean the kitchen, but that didn’t happen mind you I cleaned this kitchen all week after day after day. Sweeping and mopping etc, dinner put away. I hear him picking up the babies toys in the living room that’s it. Stuff still all misplaced on the counters and couch etc. I give my all to clean and he barely does anything to help. I am exhausted. I also work part time, but most days I am up at 7-8 am with our baby taking care of the house and her. I just want help. Or for him to even take over.

I'm the worst mom ever

My husband has turned me into the worst mother ever. My husband took a night shift job without talking to me about it. He told me he'd get up at 12pm and help with the baby still before he goes to work so I'm not burnt out but that's not at all what's happening. This man gets up at 3pm if I'm lucky, does what he wants, helps me for maybe 20 minutes, and leaves. So I'm handling our baby all day 24/7 all by myself. Well I want to be a patient, caring, and loving mother but by the end of the day when we get to bed time where she needs me to be all those things most I am the most hateful woman alive. I hate how I am to my baby at night but by the time we get to bed time I'm exhausted and just want to not chase a baby around the house for 20 minutes. I find myself yelling and screaming and doing things that won't hurt my baby but I definitely wouldn't normally do. I hate the woman I've become. I just want to love my daughter again and I want to enjoy being a mom.

I’m 7 weeks pp and It feels like my husband hates me…

The first thing my husband did when we got home from the hospital after having our babygirl is throw my pregnancy pillow across the room…

He asked what I wanted as a push present, I gave him some ideas, he didn’t get me anything. He only got me a present after I gave him gifts for his first Father’s Day…I didn’t get anything for Mother’s Day either.

Our 5th night home, I was bawling my eyes out and crying out in pain because my nipples hurt so badly due to being so new to breast feeding and from exhaustion. He was next to me in bed and on his phone…didn’t ask if I was okay or if I needed anything.

Those are just a few of the many. I don’t know what to say to him at this point because he just shuts me down or becomes super defensive whenever I try to talk to him about it. I feel so alone.

IS THIS A COLD SORE?

My mom gets cold sores and always has. I have never. My mom and daughter (2.5yrs old) always kiss on the lips and i ALWAYS tell them "NO!!!!" My mom knows my concerns and always replies, "I havent had a cold sore in a long time." Tonight, I noticed this on my child's face and im freaking out. Getting her stabbed for herpes (cold sores) tomorrow. Thoughts?

Is this rude?

My partner's mum is a hoarder and wanted to do a clear out of her house. So she leant her our vacuum cleaner as we had a spare. The one we gave her was bigger and better suction but we managed.
She leant it for approx 2 months.

When my partner went to pick it up, the nozzle had broken (snapped) she had taped it back on with thick masking tape.
She then mentioned she had ordered herself the same model etc, due to be delivered later that day. It was a Henry vacuum cleaner.

She made no offer to replace ours. She was smiling that it was a great vacuum and she couldn't wait to get one of her own. She also struggles financially so it's a bit awkward.

Is this rude or am I overreacting?

Potty training

My little boy is 20 months old. My mother in law is constantly going on about potty training and saying that when my husband was little he was potty trained from a very young age. Both my husband and I have said to her that it’s not the right time for us as a family to start potty training for various reasons. She still continues to mention. So today she was looking after him for the first time and sent me a picture saying when she went to the bathroom she made my little boy go on his potty and he went a couple of times. I get that’s great but I’m Just really hung up on the fact that we have said no multiple times and she’s gone against it. I told her I wasn’t particularly happy with what she did but she always has an excuse. Am I being out of order?