Kinda embarrassing writing this lol but here’s goes nothing

He probably is not attracted to you. Any man who doesn't love you the way you are doesn't deserve you. No matter how hard you try. He's meant to teach you what he wants not leave you in the dark

Sorry but he sounds like a huge part of the problem. How can you feel confident enough to initiate or act sexy when he shuts you down when you do? If my man did that to me I would feel the same way. He's a confidence killer. He should be buidling you up. Have you called him out on this?

Maybe he is just more into porn or watches too much to not appreciate what is in front of him?

I wanted to add too that when he wants to have sex, we do but when I try I get pushed off. It’s been 2 months since we had sex. He also did tell me before that he has a porn problem

He doesn't like you. Move on. I'm sure another guy will find you sexy. Men are just losers.

Whether a lap dance from you would turn him on is irrelevant to the problem here lol. Of course that would turn most men on. But if hes actually attracted to you, so would the mere act of you touching and initiating things! You shouldn't have to do these extra things just for him to want you. That's the off thing here. My man wants me all the time and yes he loves when I bring out my sexy side, but he is all over it when I simply initiate things too! He's gaslighting you. There is something deeper going on here and you are not the issue. You are actually trying to be intimate with him and he's actively denying you! Have you ever thought about your needs and what he's not fulfilling for you? Ever thought about turning him down next time he tries to see how it makes him feel?