Tension at home

Idk. You're gonna have to dig deep to assist him and be there for him because he is where he is partly because of you. So help him get that job that he needs and support him however way he needs it. It's not easy for him in that situation and I empathise with him.

I have been feeling similarly with my husband (also been together 10 years and have our first baby, almost 3 months old). He goes to therapy, but I’m thinking of suggesting he goes a little more frequently, and maybe suggesting some podcasts and dad groups for him. I find it VERY hard to be able to help him as all of my energy is going into my new baby and my own self care. Ultimately we can’t fix things for them, but still be empathetic.

Yes he definitely needs some professional help. If you can perhaps consider paying a job recruiter and hand over that part. Then I agree with @Jessica therapy and dad's group might help. He's depressed atp. It's a terrible spot to be in for you. If he refuses help not much you can do. With a new baby It's so hard for you. I hope y'all can get past this.

My husband has a tendency to get like this too, he got fired and hasn’t been working for 4 months and he didn’t really apply for much jobs the whole time… I had to do it, we have a son and I’ve been pushing him to do things like studying for a trucking coarse. I finally started applying for him all together and got him an interview and finally today he was offered a job right when things were starting to look scary… honestly he started getting better when he saw that his back was against the wall… he almost didn’t want to go to the interview and wanted to skip it to go work with my uncle BUT he realized himself that if he doesn’t get something going soon.. than we won’t be able to pay rent lol. And I think men sometimes need to feel that for behind their ass. Sooo it’s like a balance between helping & also letting them know that there making things risky