What is everyone’s arrangement with grandparents? In terms of food

My child’s father’s mum has offered to help looking after my little one for three days a week,and I am so so appreciative. I’m not happy as he should be doing it, and having my daughter there means yet again everything is coming out of my pocket. She lives fairly fair away which is costing £20 in travel and obviously time.

I sent my daughter with eveything in terms of snacks, fruit, yogurt drinks and, thought she would feed my daughter as she eats too!
However she has asked me to now bring food for her!

I’m not too clear on other situations but I felt it was quite odd as she offered and I would think that a grandparent would at least cook their grandchild a meal.
Don’t get me wrong I really appreciate it I’m just worried about me spreading myself too thin and finding myself losing out too much for the help.

Her son is worthless so when my daughter is with him I’m paying for things, cause he never has money yet, and when she’s her her nan I’m paying and when she’s with me I’m paying!!!
Like WTF and I barely have any money anyways!

What’s everyone’s usual arrangement?

in our community

People bringing their ACTIVELY sick children to playgroups is why I choose nature first for our son

Before anyone says anything, yes I'm aware kids get sick... No shit. Doesn't mean we all bring our sick children to playgroups just because it happens.

Also yes I'm aware of building immunity, doesn't mean our son and other children need to build sleepless nights because of someone's lack of judgement. Especially immune compromised children. NOTE I said ACTIVELY sick and specifically state playgroups that are NOT mandatory for parents. You can sit out for one week if your child is ACTIVELY sick. Just thought I would be specific in what I'm saying so no one goes off topic and says "well you can't keep them in for every sniffle" not what I'm talking about. To finish any comments saying "well don't go to playgroups then" will be blocked. Shouldn't have to avoid them because someone wants to bring a newly sick child in 🤷🏼‍♀️ I have avoided playgroups when my son was sick for 2 weeks to be sure, because I'm my area Mums bring their newborns...not that hard. For now we will be doing small nature walks 🌲
Sincerely,
Frustrated parent with a toddler waking up coughing all night 😮‍💨

Co-parenting Issues

I have a son who’s under one. And me and his dad split before he was born. All we do is argue and it’s getting me so down I am getting to breaking point.

We live 30 minutes between each other and for logistic reasons I chose a nursery near me so I can still get to work on time and it’s easy to get to. He isn’t happy about this wanted me to have one nearer him or in his town. He doesn’t pay for any of the nursery fees due to funding not come yet im paying a full £1800 a month. Any milk nappies ect I have take to nursery. We try meet half way on swap overs or I drop him off at his house.

I work full time and because he complains about fuel and affording anything I suggest him have 3 nights a week including a weekend day so I also have a weekend day. Every week he has ago at me saying I’m taking his son away from family or has something on so I end up giving my weekend day up. I have lent him so much money he can’t afford fuel or much for our son so I’m basically providing for two households. He just wants more money and more weekend with our son so I just end up with a couple of hours on evening in the week day with him.

I don’t know what to do anymore he gets so nasty and I’m so scared of him. He flips out so quickly with me and all I’ve done is help where I can. I want my son to have his dad in his life but I a physically, financially and emotionally burnt out. What do I do?

Postpartum rage

1230am here- just had a meltdown and cried hysterically to my husband. My son who is now down to one feeding per night, woke up at 1120pm just as I was falling asleep. I tried my hardest to settle as I knew it wasn’t hunger. He got louder and I lost it. I came out storming to the kitchen to get a bottle (he only had .5 oz) and layed back down and just lost it. I’m exhausted, the balance of toddler and baby is insane, I haven’t had an hour to myself in months, I have no adult interaction all day, my husband works long hours, I have no one checking up on me. My rage is through the roof. The crying is getting to me this time around. It feels never ending and like the walls are closing in as the cries get louder. I need help. I need to escape and recharge. My husband no longer recognizes me, heck I don’t either. I keep it together in front of of the kids and let it out as soon as they’re backs are turned and then put a fake smile on. I love my children dearly but, I know I’m not ok. This is not joyful for me at this time. I need to know this will pass and I will be better for my children and my marriage.

Shaking

I've been struggling to get out with my boy who's now 12 weeks. I've just been going for walks etc where I don't have to interact with anyone 🙃
It's my friends birthday coming up so I went to the shops yesterday. Got to the till and I just couldn't stop shaking. And then I was stuttering and it was just a mess. Idk if its because there was a long queue behind me or if I was just nervous or something? Has anyone else had this. Do I just need to go out more?
Once I left the shop I felt fine I was relieved to get out of there.

I also feel weird walking round with the pram in public. Like I'm not really there? Dizzy feeling? Idk it's hard to explain.

Would you go on holiday without your 7 month old baby?

Hear me out, I’m not trying to be public enemy number 1 here…

My partner is absolutely desperate to get away on holiday this year, we had saved up to go last year however I struggled a lot during my pregnancy and wasn’t up to it. We were toying with the idea of going away this year when our baby will be 7 months old to have some family time and relax after some pretty traumatic experiences surrounding the birth and early postpartum (we are all safe, well and thriving now thankfully!).

After talking about it, my parents have offered to have her for the week instead of us taking her away with us so we can fully relax and explore without trying to navigate naps/feeds/BLW in the holiday heat. They are incredibly supportive and involved in her care and have already had her overnight numerous times therefore I’m not worried about them having her for a week for us, but I feel a huge amount of mum guilt for considering it.

She is exclusively formula fed every 2-3 hours through the day and sleeps 12 hours per night and is just starting to have first tastes of food.

Has anyone been away without their little ones when they were so young?

Wellness check or no?

My friend-or old friend i Will not be exposing my boys to her anymore- had been threantning to send her 7 year old to his grandmas/dad's house if he doesnt start to listen better. Saying "alex wont have a mom much longer if he does xyz"
Hes a very hyper 7 year old whos also autistic. She has a 13 year old still with her.
I went over today and when my son asked where alex was she kept saying "hes dead. I dont want to talk about it!"
Then made some comments about "ive seen enough guts" "brownie[dog] better listen to me or you're next." "I will probably never use a woodchipper again."
Shes an alcoholic and off the wagon and thsi could just all be drunk talk, but i left and filed a cps case regardless as I am worried for her son.
My mom said I should do a wellness check as well.