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Baby Daddy Drama

To renew or not my narc husband’s dependant visa?

Honestly, these days all I have been thinking about is whether I renew my dependant husband’s visa or not. With his completely obvious user friendly nature, narcissistic behavior, all the shouts and fights we had even during pregnancy and while recovering after giving birth, even him knowing I am in so much pain still treating me as if I could normally walk and do stuff as expected—- all i ever think about is NOT RENEWING his visa! He doesn’t deserve it at all! He even suggests to bring back our kids or our newborn to our country so it would be easier for us especially while we’re back to work. He has a point but hello?? He was here in the UK because of our son in the first place! We were already separated for a year but for the sake of reuniting with my kid, I needed to petition him at the same time as it’s the easier pathway. Nothing has changed as I am still experiencing the same cycle of abuse. He even intentionally made me pregnant like I told him to use condom because I don’t like the side effects of pills but clearly I ended up bearing a child. Don’t get me wrong but I also wanted to have a baby girl, but I know in his case, I could not if with this man. But I got fooled and I hated myself for that.

So as of today, I am in grave pain on my lower back and leg due to post Csection, doctor said might be side effects of having epidural. I could not walk and move around when the pain is intense, feeling disabled for weeks now. Visa is expiring on the 8th and im the main sponsor so I get to decide whether or not to extend his dependant visa. But in my situation now, that I would need to rely on his strength and presence to be there for us with the kids, i am given no choice but to lend him an opportunity that will eventually lead him to continue his abuse and may eventually leave us even when I need him around for his own convenience.

I don’t know whether I need to seek asylum to the city council or social workers to find refuge. But im not eligible to access public funds. So i feel like I got no coice really but to let this narc husband stay for another 3 years.

I would still appreciate to hear any feedbacks though. Thank you for whoever would patiently read this. xx