I feel like I hate my husband.
I feel like I’ve been getting annoyed at my husband a lot lately. I’m a SAHM, and he works from home except for one day a week when he goes into the office.
I feel like he expects me to do everything. I cook, feed the baby, do the deep cleaning, etc. He does try to clean too, but honestly, I don’t really like the way he does things. For example, he never cleans the bathroom, and he doesn’t really mop or vacuum. He cleans the kitchen, but even the way he washes things annoys me because he doesn’t rinse the dishes properly. We have a dishwasher, but he prefers to hand-wash little things throughout the day.
I’ve given him bath time with our 18-month-old son, but even then, when he gets him out of the bath, I’m the one getting his clothes ready and everything. Then he sits with him for like 15–20 minutes and puts him to bed.
During the weekdays, he does play with him sometimes during the day, but in general, I’m the one with our LO most of the time, which makes sense because he’s working. But when he doesn’t have meetings, he spends a lot of that time playing games.
I’ve started to really resent him, and honestly, sometimes I feel like I hate him. We used to be such a loving couple, but I don’t even feel like giving him attention anymore because of all this resentment I’m building up.
I feel like if I cook, he should at least take care of all the kitchen cleaning. Is that unreasonable? Am I wrong for feeling this way?
Mostly a rant
I feel like I must be going out of my mind.
Me and my husband are constantly fighting. He keeps saying it's over the little stuff, but all these little things add up? And I feel exhausted when it's the same thing happening over and over again and he never listens to me.
He spent 4 months after baby was born telling me there was nothing wrong with baby, at nearly 5 months after constant fighting I have a diagnosis for him and it sucks to be right but also I don't know why my husband had to fight me so much and undermine me.
His mum never respects our boundaries and he pretends he doesn't see it rather than get involved in addressing the issue.
Our home is an absolute mess. As in, mould growing in places that don't get cleaned and I try my best to do what I can but birth left me disabled and I have a sick baby to look after all the time. I feel like I shouldn't have to walk him to something, put it in his hands and ask him to take care of it or clean it. I wish he'd just look around and see what needs doing. He also messes up whatever room I've managed to get on top of and it's like having a teenager in the house.
He also keeps doing really stupid things around the baby, like holding him whilst cooking steak and the fat is spitting everywhere or just a few hours ago leaving scissors balancing above our babies head and he keeps saying it's okay because nothing bad happened but surely that's beside the lint you want to try and avoid an accident at all costs?
I know nothing will resolve. I just felt like I needed to express this somewhere because everyone keeps saying he's such a nice guy but don't factor in how having a grown ass baby to look after is killing me.
at what point can i just give away the toys? lol
my almost 7 year old refuses to clean her room. she will kick and hit and scream and fight and flat out refuse shouting “NO!!!” until we give up. sometimes very seldomly she will cave and attempts to clean it over the span of several hours, sometimes a whole day and complaining the entire time, after literally days of fighting with us about it. but she will only do it if someone stands in there with her and delegates tasks. this is unsustainable as i have 781 other things to do around the home and a 3 month old to care for.
i have made a chore chart getting her room able to be clean within 5-6 steps, when focusing and just getting it done it takes at most 30-45 minutes if it’s really, really messy. i have cleaned it for her, i have stood in there to delegate tasks, i have tried firm, i have tried soft, i have tried everything and nothing works. i am always telling her to pick up after herself when it’s small so it doesn’t get big and hard to manage yet this happens literally every time. at what point can i just donate the toys except the ones she actively plays with everyday? should i take them and put them up in a box and she can earn them back? what do i do???
she’s currently on Day 4 of no TV/screen time and no special treats until she does her chores and still, no end in sight. i’m so burnt out i just want her to do her chores because it’s the right thing to do she can’t just make massive messes and never help clean them up.
