My MIL and stepdad spoil our 2.5 year old. My partner has told them multiple times not to but they don’t listen. It’s got to the point where if my daughter gets given a gift and it’s not in the right colour she’ll ask for a different colour, if she doesn’t get it she will have a strop or ask for it in the colour she’ll wants.
She gets gifts every week, I mean bikes, trampoline, playdoh, football, you name it. But we never get consulted about it. I feel like she wants to be there all the time and I’m less than. She is turning into a bit of a spoilt brat if I’m honest 🫠 we’re always bad cop at home saying no.
His MIL has her twice a week and has done since I went back to work. She wants to come round either Thursday or Friday night to see her and on a weekend as well, but now I don’t really want to be around them or limit the interaction because it’s excessive.
She doesn’t seem to want to see me or her son or our newborn, just obsessed with toddler.
My mum also recently passed so I’m in a real difficult position in regards with what to do/ not seeing her as I feel bad.
How often would you see them/ what would you do?
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Id have to tell her to stop and listen to you or you will have to stop seeing her as much because shes working against you at this point x

Do they're picking one of their grandchildren out and only spending time with them?
Is it gender related? Did she always want a daughter?
I'd be very firm and say, while you appreciate all the time and love their showing, they need to stop showing it in a monetary way. She has everything (and more) that she needs and gifts should be limited to birthdays and Christmas (and Easter if you do that)
You can say you've even spoken to someone about her behaviour and that it's linked to rewards for nothing.

I think simply asking to limit gifts because she's being spoilt is enough to start with. Maybe suggest putting that money into a bank account for your daughter to use in the future.
Without dwelling on it too much if it's too painful, do you think that they are trying to make up for your daughter losing a grandparent?