Am i missing something?
i tried to make it work with my sons father again, we met up on his birthday to talk things out and over the weekend because he kept telling me he’d send money ($25) for me to get what i need to cook a craving we both wanted. friday night on his way to work he told me he’d send it right then and there bc he gets off in the morning and he’s likely to be tired to do it then
I said okay and went to sleep when he made it to work and when i woke up at 4am i seen he still didn’t do it so i told him to not tell me he’s going to do something and not follow through it bc that can be an issue later on if we dealing with something serious.
he said i was tripping on him for no reason and im trying to control how he handles things and that he never gave me a specific time or whatever, i dropped the conversation bc he sent it and it was whatever
yesterday when it came close to the time for him to get ready for work i called him to see what he was up to and he was hostile bc im asking him if he was sleep something cause it just looks weird. he said it’s nothing and that he’s finna shower, take a nap and come see me before work and that just rubbed me the wrong way and after we hung up i texted him and said it’s cool i don’t wanna see you no more you can just pick your food up and give call it a night
he got upset because he didn’t understand why i switched up and im telling him im in my feelings and i dont wanna argue with him about it because it’ll be me tripping on him. we still ended up arguing and he was like forget it he just gon drop whatever stuff i had off and go to work early
im still trying to talk to him as i calm down from the argument we had and he was still upset, he showed up to my place and tried to give me my stuff and leave but i stopped him so we could talk it out and diffuse the situation
he screamed at me, telling me hes not doing this with me anymore and how he doesn’t wanna talk to me anymore and i’m trying to mediate the situation so he can calm down but he didn’t want me touching him or anything. i took his keys out of the ignition because he was walking off and he snatched them from and when i sat in his car and waiting he called his mom and moments later called the police.
while we were waiting for the police i still tried to talk to him because i was confused on why hes taking drastic measures when the issue wasn’t that big to begin with but i went back in the house after pouring the food i prepared for him into his and literally his whole family and the police were outside my house wanting me to come out.
i didn’t bother and they left but here it is the next day and im trying to wrap my head around it, he won’t answer the phone and ive been texting him but no response…im more hurt from me trying to prevent this and us talking about figuring it out when we fight instead of resulting to destruction
on his birthday but idk im just praying for me and my sons well being.
what am i not seeing in this situation? i feel like this is a bad dream but im wide awake and him being non responsive is the reality check that it really did…
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You did great dropping the conversation when he was trying to argue with you. You also stayed curious when he was throwing a tantrum the next day when you called him before his work.
You might slipped up after you hung up with him. It seems like you are still upset when you sent him the text. You should have told him how upset you were while you were on the phone. He ended the call with you thinking he was still going to see you. He can’t read your mind. Ofc it’s confusing when you text him telling you don’t want to see him.
Next day is also confusing. You went from wanting to see him, to not wanting to see him, to wanting to work things out. Did you ever told him why you needed time alone and why you wanted to talk? Instead of “I’m in my feelings.” Tell him “I’m upset because when we talk on the phone. I want more conversations from both sides. What do you think?” You can ask him what he thinks, and stop assuming every pause from him means he doesn’t care. Also state your needs!
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