My boyfriend called me a slag
During an argument about 2 months ago, my boyfriend started a conversation about my past by saying “you’re a slag” then started asking me for details of my sex life from 3 years before we met. There was nothing bad or wrong about it, but turns out he was in a dark place and was overthinking. We’d moved on from it
We’d casually call eachother a slag playfully before that, but after he used it against me and ment it, I told him I hated the word and felt defensive everytime he used it on me.
Last night he called me it during sex a few times. “Look at you, you slag, you’re loving this” “You’re a slag, that’s all you are” and it really caught me off guard. My heart just dropped. I tried to lighten the mood by responding “not a slag, i’m your slag” and he again doubled down with “you’re a slag”. The word lost all playfulness to me when he used it and he ment it, now it just hurts. He knows he hurt me because he was particularly lovey dovey afterwards, but he went to work and didn’t say a word to me this morning.
Unsure on how to navigate this. I’m worried bringing it up will bring back the conversation of my past which I don’t have the mental capacity for right now.
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Honestly he knows he’s hurting your feelings right now and he doesn’t seem to care, I’d tell him he needs to correct himself or go somewhere else with that bs, but for you maybe just bring up to him that you don’t want to hear that word anymore in ANY context even in the ones that seem playful and then you’ll explain why you feel that way about it, if he doesn’t understand it then give him back his same energy and not “gaf” because if he doesn’t like that don’t care attitude then he needs to correct himself
Do you think maybe its also having the capacity to acknowledge hes become a full on red flag? You express how something makes you feel hurt ,the other adult listens to that and respects it as a boundary by either seizing the conversation to a stop with clarity or by responding with acknowledgement then never fucking twsting that gotdam line ever again. Please say something to him. He was inside you while insulting you and you cannot water down your feelings. It sets us up for being the blamed in a situation we never wanted
Respectfully he’s an asshole.
Definitely bring it up, he was insulting you and even doubled down on it nobody deserves that. I honestly would not be nice about it when bringing it up, bs stern don’t let him interrupt you and make your point.
If he doesn’t respect it after that send that energy right back at him and really evaluate your relationship. You are beautiful, smart, and a billion other good things not a slag. Any good loving man would fix his shit if they hurt you this is childish boy behavior.
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