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Lonely and friendly mummies 🙂

How do I talk to my partner about how im feeling

Ive always had difficulty expressing how I feel and talking about things. Lately ive felt more irritated at my partner because of the things he dose or says. For context he works sometimes long hours as a plumber and he is the only one able to work right now. We got pregnant pretty soon into our relationship and didnt move in together until a month before our son was born. He was behind on bills due to his ex and had alot of debt because of that. He also had to get a new car, so the bills just kept coming. We live in my parents basement that is an apartment so we dont have ro pay rent thankfully but we are still hardly making it. With his car payment and insurance and credit card debit, being paid weekly really puts us in a bind. I have no clothes that fit me except for a few things and both of our shoes have holes in them. I have been telling him for months to get new shoes but he just refuses. Says it to difficult to find because of his shoe size. We was going to use our tax return to pay off most of this stuff but we have had such a difficult time with that and still haven't gotten it. Hes always making comments like " we are never going to get it so why even think that we will" or we will always live paycheck to paycheck it is what it is.
We try to budget and do what we can to save but its just not enough. Lately he has started to make comments about our sons birthday which is less then 3 weeks away at this point in time and saying things like we are going to have to host it here we cant rent a place when there is to much we need here at the house. And people are just going to have to use their imagination because we are not going to have anything there. I personally have been planning his party abd have been putting money away so we can get a few things like a smash cake and decor for his high chair. Now he is saying he wants to use that money to get him shoes because he cant keep putting it off and that has me really irritated because I have this hole plan and been saving for about 2 months so we can have some things. I dont know what to do. I definitely dont want to have it here. We had our gender reveal here and it was so stressful. I just want to rent a place for 2 hours have our village show uo and celebrate our son. How do I talk to him about this without my irritation coming though.