How to approach advice
Hi mummas, I’m just wondering if anyone else feels this way since becoming a mum.
How do you feel when it comes to receiving advice from family, friends or other people about your baby and the way you parent?
I completely understand that most people mean well, and sometimes advice can genuinely be helpful. But I’ve noticed that when I’m constantly being told what I should or shouldn’t be doing, or hearing things like “you should do this,” “try this,” or “I used to do it this way,” I can start to feel really frustrated and overwhelmed.
Sometimes I don’t necessarily want advice—I just want to be able to talk about something without feeling like I need to change what I’m doing. I also feel like constantly hearing other people’s opinions can sometimes make you second-guess yourself as a mum, even when you were originally confident in your own decision.
I’m curious whether other mums feel the same way. Do you usually appreciate advice and take it on board, or do you sometimes find yourself becoming frustrated by it? Have you found that becoming a mum has made you want more space to figure things out for yourself and trust your own instincts?
No judgement either way—I’d genuinely love to hear how other mums feel about this.
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I don’t even listen to them anymore. It’s just background noise. Like “yeah okay thanks”. And I never think about it again. Just let it flow right off of you.
You can start conversations by saying something like “I’m not looking for advice just need to complain”.
Best bit about advice is you don’t have to take it. Say thank you and then continue to parent the way YOU want to. Sod anyone else it’s your life and your baby. Parent how you want to
If it's someone you are close to and you just want to rant then maybe set the boundaries early. "I need to get this off my chest, I'm not looking for solutions just a space to vent" let's them know straight up what you are looking for. I think it's just human nature to "try to help" and that can have the opposite effect. My MIL once started "I may be talking out of turn" so I interrupted her and told her not to say it then. She was shocked and went to carry on anyway and I just clarified "we haven't asked for advice so if you think it might be speaking out of turn, it probably is and is best left unsaid"
It's really up to you totake it or leave it
I totally can relate
I get super frustrated when family trying to tell me how to parent my kids. Sometimes all you want to do is just to vent, and that's why I say that. Thank you but...
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How to approach advice
Hi mummas, I’m just wondering if anyone else feels this way since becoming a mum.
How do you feel when it comes to receiving advice from family, friends or other people about your baby and the way you parent?
I completely understand that most people mean well, and sometimes advice can genuinely be helpful. But I’ve noticed that when I’m constantly being told what I should or shouldn’t be doing, or hearing things like “you should do this,” “try this,” or “I used to do it this way,” I can start to feel really frustrated and overwhelmed.
Sometimes I don’t necessarily want advice—I just want to be able to talk about something without feeling like I need to change what I’m doing. I also feel like constantly hearing other people’s opinions can sometimes make you second-guess yourself as a mum, even when you were originally confident in your own decision.
I’m curious whether other mums feel the same way. Do you usually appreciate advice and take it on board, or do you sometimes find yourself becoming frustrated by it? Have you found that becoming a mum has made you want more space to figure things out for yourself and trust your own instincts?
No judgement either way—I’d genuinely love to hear how other mums feel about this.
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