Rejection?

I feel like I’ve been rejected by my LO. When he’s with me or my husband he always cries. Since he’s had his 8 week jabs(is now 12 weeks, but 5weeks corrected), he’s been really fussy. He’s clingy and cries most of the time, it’s rare to get a smile out of him or even play with him for more than 3 minutes before he starts screaming again. We thought he was colicky for a while, but yesterday we went to his grandparents house, and he was a completely different baby. He was happy, he played. He smiled. There was only one point in the day where he cried and that was when he was with me, as soon as I handed him to someone else he was fine. Now, I feel like he hates me, I feel like he’s rejected me and I’m an absolute failure because I can’t make him feel safe with me. I’m his mom, I should be the safest place in the world for him?! I don’t know how to shake this feeling now.. how to fix it.
Has anyone else ever felt this? 😞😢

in our community

Who was rude?

I went out to eat with my friend Tara. I actually invited her out and wanted to do something nice for her birthday. Since she was not having a party or doing anything special I decided I’d plan a dinner for her and pay for her meal. Now, I have no problem paying for my friends meal I was planning to do it from the beginning. However, Tara brought her boyfriend and her Mother to this dinner with her without letting me know they were coming. Long story short when the waitress asked how the checks were going to be.. I said I’d pay for mine and Tara’s. Tara’s mother and boyfriend told me I was rude to not pick up their tab. Even threw in the comment that I “must be broke.” Nothing else was said after that. It was awkward for me and I felt like my kind gesture was blowing up in my face. My friend did not say anything to her mother and man for saying those things to me. Which made me feel even worse.

The End

Hi Moms,

Remember my post about joining the Navy and potentially leaving my son with my husband while I’m away? The arrangement was contingent on me sending him all of the housing allowance, plus additional financial support.

There is a history of DV, and so many of you warned me that putting myself in that position could be extremely risky. You told me not to do it.

Well… update.

While I was helping my husband rebuild his resume and update his professional profiles, including LinkedIn, I discovered that he had been talking to another woman.

He denied it until I showed him what I found. Then he became quiet. No remorse. Nothing.

I didn’t want him anywhere near me after that, so I made him sleep on the floor.

Over Labor Day weekend, he spent the night somewhere else.

Then, to my absolute shock, I found out that he had sent naked pictures of me to friends, even his own brother.

He also took our only car without telling me where he was going and took all of the bank cards with him.

At this point, part of me just wants to go straight to the police and then to a DV shelter.

I’m nauseous. I keep feeling like I want to shower over and over again.

And in the middle of all of this, my son keeps asking me, “Where is Daddy?”

That is the part that breaks me.

I keep thinking about packing a bag, taking my child and leaving the moment I have the opportunity.

Then another part of me thinks about the trauma and instability this could create for my little boy. Maybe I should find a job, quietly become financially independent, prepare everything properly and then get us out.

I don’t know anymore.

My husband is 18 years older than me. I’m an expat here with no family support system, yet somehow I am expected to provide for him AND our son while trying to rebuild my own life.

I AM TIRED.

Tired of princess men.

Tired of liars.

Tired of being in survival mode.

And guess who looks like the bad person through the eyes of my son?

Me.

Because he is too little to understand what his father is doing, and I will not put that burden on his little soul or tell him adult things he should never have to carry.

As I’m writing this, it’s 2 pm the next day and he still isn’t home.

I genuinely don’t know whether I should pack our things and leave now, or stay long enough to secure a job and financially prepare my exit.

I could really use advice from moms who have been through something similar, especially those who had to leave without family nearby.

What age would’ve/would you have wanted to send your child to nursery/preschool for the first time?

In an ideal world, what age would you have sent your child to nursery/pre school for the first time?

I have a 16 month old who has never been to nursery. I am lucky to only work one day as a teacher and have that days childcare covered by family. I have not had to worry about finding the right setting, changes in routine, settling in etc.

What age does nursey/preschool become beneficial enough to send them?

We see friends with babies of similar ages and attend play/toddler groups each week.

MIL PROBLEM + HUSBAND PROBLEM

So I kind of laid down boundaries with my mil as I’m having my second baby in 2 weeks and my husband is clearly not supporting me whatsoever. He literally told me today he’s worried about his mom because I stopped being quiet and finally stood up for myself and what I want for our children together

My husband and I already have discussed and he said he could get on board with

I told my husband recently if he doesn’t tell his mother, I will tell her. It’s been 3 years of me expressing my concerns with no change.

Now I have told my mil and she literally messaged me back saying respect is a two way street. I’ve let my husband and mil do things the way they want for 3 years and I said enough is enough. I feel my husband isn’t for me supporting me as his wife the way I need in many different ways and I am extremely hurt

My main issue was that I didn’t make clear boundaries from the beginning and I wish I did with my husband and mil. His family is so for one another and my family is also broken upn my side but I don’t know what’s even going on

I’ve told my husband what bothers me and what I don’t like about my mil and how she chooses to handle the care for my daughter when she does look after her. I told him I want her to have more independence, she has held my 3 year old daughter for naps still, or feels the need to constantly be holding her.

I want more independence and make my own parenting boundaries for my children, especially my new baby coming in 2 months. That’s normal and fair to want right?

Am I wrong?

Park etiquette? Making friends?

I feel a little embarrassed to even be asking this but I am terrible at being social and making friends.

Today my son (he’s 22 months) was trying to make friends at the park, it was super cute, but all the kids were a bit older 5-10 I’m guessing. He kept going up and saying hi, followed by his minion language, and the kids just seemed annoyed and gave me the “get your baby” look. I totally get it, they are kids, not upset at them at all. I’m more upset at myself because I didn’t know how to help him, was I supposed to pull him away from the kids or let them figure it out?
How do I help him make friends when I see people with kids his age? I brought a beech ball and offered it for them both to play there was 1 other toddler the parent seemed to pull their kid away, I’m like 😳 did I scare the people… the parent was right there. I hate my social anxiety. Anyway.
Main questions. Am I supposed to pull him away from kids that don’t seem to want to play with him? ( they kept getting up and he kept following them till I pulled him away) 💔
And. Tips on making toddler friends at the park.

Thank you

My aunt and cousins keep walking around my grandparents house calling “dibs.” (Not in front of me)

Today my grandpa mentioned my aunt called dibs on the table we were eating at…I’ve heard that they’ve said this about other things and I’ve never appreciated it but maybe it’s because they just piss me off/are assholes in general that I’m so irritated?! Also, my grandmas Parkinson’s-dementia is rapidly getting worse and I’m super emotional about everything right now…but like is this not so rude and just wild?!? Just need someone to tell me if I’m irrationally pissed lol