Tax free child care uk

Hi ladies
I’m just wondering if anyone could talk me through how the payments work for the tax free child care for nursery?
We are eligible for 30 free hours which we claim and the nursery have sorted for us.
I have only just realised today when updating my account that I am also eligible for tax free child care which I believe is where the government pays 20% of the nursery bill?

My nursery bill per month is £137, I have selected and set up my nursery on the account, I’m just not really understanding how the money gets paid in and how the gov know how much to pay for their bit?

I have taken a screen shot of the screen that came up for when I was trying to have a nosy round and figure out how to pay, I haven’t actually got my next bill just yet, and last month I just paid the full £137 myself straight from my bank account as I didn’t realise I was eligible for the tax free one. No biggy really about the first bill as he has only just started nursery so that was his first bill, I would just like to know how to pay it with the government bit in preparation for the next bill.
Thank you

in our community

I'm just annoyed, I was late once to nursery pick up and was made to feel so guilty

I'm just needing to vent honestly as I've had such a shitty morning.

My son finishes nursery at 11:45am every day, but they like parents to pick up between 11:35-40. I am there to pick him up on time every single day without.

I also have a baby, who I need to take with me to pick up.

Today as I was leaving I was literally picking her up to put her in the the pram and she done a massive poo. I quickly put her down on her mat and changed her, and then left. It took me a few minutes but I still managed to arrive for 11:45. I know this is technically 'late' for their preferred pick up times but I figured they'd understand a few minutes.

I buzz to get in and as the lady opens the door for me I go to apologise for being a few minutes late but before I even get a chance to get a word out she says "can I just remind you pick up time is 11:40" in such a horrible tone, talking to me like a child. I says sorry and explained it was just typical baby had a dirty nappy as I was trying to leave trying to lighten the mood a little. She then goes on to tell me that all the children who stay til 3 have their lunch at 11:45, so I need to make sure I'm here at 11:40, because now my son is crying because he was told he isn't getting lunch with the other kids. She was laying it on really thick that my son was upset and it was my fault because I was late. She repeated like 3 times that he was *really* upset. I was stood there feeling so small and guilty and thinking wow well you've just spent at least 3 minutes here explaining how bad it is that I was late, turning 5 minutes into 8 minutes but okay... I apologised.

Then she goes to fetch my son, and he comes out smiling and runs over to me for a cuddle. She then comes over with a tissue and starts going on again like "aw he was so upset" and wiping his face even though he wasn't crying? She was like "see I told you mummy was coming" and then she turned back to me and says "I had to keep telling him mummy will be here in 2 minutes, she'll be here in a few minutes, she's just coming" like I'm sorry but I was 5 MINUTES LATE.

I know I was wrong for being late. I apologised several times. I would understand her tone if maybe I was late all the time but I'm never late. Ever. I just left feeling so guilty and embarrassed and needed to vent😔

Has anyone ever had to leave a baby and toddler group because of their child's behaviour?

I think my 2 year old son was just tired today but he was rolling around, throwing things, running off and it became so stressful that I just left the group.
Felt like quite a bad parent even though he's usually fine and enjoys it.

21 month old boy out of control 🥲

My almost 2 year old son will not sit still in prams/trolleys/highchairs without tantruming/shouting/crying and I just don’t know how to deal with it.

Yesterday I had a really horrible experience in Tesco where he wasn’t happy sat in the trolley (he was fed, clean, offered toys/dummy) and he spent pretty much the whole time crying, screaming, shouting “up”, “mummy”, pulling at my hands, throwing himself back in a tantrum. I felt like everyone was staring at me and judging me. I tried singing and chatting to him at first but that didn’t work so resorted to ignoring it but that made it so much worse. I ended up going to the back of the store where nobody was and just cried.

How do I deal with this behaviour? Any tips?

We spend most days doing very active, fun and engaging activities because he is just so wild and needs to burn the energy haha so it’s not that he’s usually cooped up bored! But it’s got to the point where now I can’t run errands, go shopping, going for coffee/lunch with my mum friends is now my worst nightmare.

He is just on such high energy ALL the time. I see other kids his age sit and have lunch in a restaurant, sit in the pram happily. What am I doing wrong?😓

Who are the psychos out here giving their 7 year olds cell phones??

My daughter has told me a few times now since starting 2nd grade that some of her classmates have cell phones and now she wants one 🫩🫩🫩 obviously she’s not going to get one lmao, but the fact that this is already a thing and convo I’m having now is mind blowing to me, I thought I’d have a few more years

Please tell me leaving them at nursery gets easier

Positive messages only please! I cant afford not to work so not looking for advice on taking him out.

My LO is 10 months and is settling on really well. But I am really not coping well, when we are apart i can only relate the feeling to mourning. Did anyone else feel this deeply and did it ease?

My son is 13 and every day recently, I've put his breakfast on the table for him before school, and he'll either nibble a bit of leave it completely

It's food that he has asked for, so it's not like he doesn't like it, and I don't think he has an eating disorder as he'll sometimes eat quite a lot. He is very skinny though.

Sometimes he'll lie and say he ate it, then I find it in the bin (I can't be there for when he's eating breakfast).

I think he's more than old enough to sort out his own breakfast, but I know that he just won't do it. There's lots of food in the cupboard but he just won't bother. He sometimes doesn't eat his packed lunch either, but will then raid the cupboards when he gets home.

I can't afford to keep wasting food but I want him to be healthy. What would you do?