How do single mothers do it? (major rant)
Idk how i can do this anymoreš¤¦š»āāļø im a single mom and iāve been a single mom for a little over a year now, it was easier in the beginning since my son was younger but now that heās older itās been way harder. my mom has been my only support system but now she basically wants nothing to do with me, we lost my grandma (her mom) back in april an everything since then has switched between me and my mom. i understand grieving over someone is completely different for each person, but she has completely shut down how she feels about my mental health an is completely ignoring how i feel in general. my alone time an quite time have always been a big part of me but now since april she hasnāt care about my own space and itās finally catching up to me, and itās mentally draining me to the point where i want to harm myself bc i canāt take it anymore. my son was never planed, so me an the father first idea was abortion bc 1. we were 18 when we found out 2. we knew it wasnāt the time an place for it. but people got into my head saying to keep it an that imma have a strong support system if i have the baby and everything else you can think of, but where are those people now? no where to be found an donāt even reach out anymore. my einschl thought was if i went thru with the abortion i was gonna to regret it and from there i kinda went with that bc i didnāt wanna have the guilt built up in me for doing something like that so i obviously went thru with the pregnancy. but now at this point i have no support system at all to fall back on, i donāt work as i am the one to watch my son 24/7 so i canāt just leave my situation like id want to. my bf is basically my only support but heās 2 hours away an his truck is broke down so he would have to use his moms car to get to me but she works during the week so itās not even a option like iād want it to be, living with him isnāt a option either. even when my bf is around he helps with my son, but when iād like some alone time with him iām not able to majority of the time bc my mom doesnāt want to watch my son for whatever reason, idk if itās envy or what bc when i was growing up myself my mom was a single mother as-well an when she would try to get into relationships my father would always mess it up for her so sheās been single pretty much my whole life, sheās always wanted a big family but obviously never found the person, so i donāt know if she just envys me for the relationship i have with my bf or what. iāve reached out to friends about this seeking for help but all they have to say is āthis is apart of parenthoodā, wanting to harm yourself is absolutely not apart of parenthood at all. i completely understand that being a parent is sacrificing your life for your child and loosing out on a lot of things like examples iāve said before, but single mothers and mothers in general need a break sometimes. iāve been dealing with the crying, whinnying, being jumped on, hair pulled, i have bruises on my body, restless sleep at night and not being able to sleep till 3-4am everynight, all while my āsupport system of a motherā doesnāt care about any of it, when she is watching him she canāt even last 10 minutes without getting upset with him bc he gets into stuff. i also completely understand that my mom isnāt my sons parent and that i am and thatās not what im trying to indicate at all bc i do understand 1,000% i am the parent and have parental responsibilities. but wanting to harm yourself as a parent bc no one is there for you or shows up for you is 100% not okay at all. iām just seeking for help and for some advice on what to do bc iām losing myself daily.
Read more on PeanutThe views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.
Learn more about our guidelines.
I'm not too sure what it's like where you are from but have you maybe looked into if there is any support from charities or organisations. I'm sure therapy isn't much of an option due to financial reasons but you should definitely seek some sort of professional help if possible. These kinds of thoughts don't always go away on their own. Trust me I've been there and I have a partner to help and even I have had times where I feel like the burden of being a parent has fallen onto just me.
I know this is difficult. You're not alone in this. If you ever need someone to chat to or have an ear to listen to you please don't hesitate to message me. Having a child so young is a lot on you not just physically but mentally too.
Please please please when you have a chance look into your local area to see if there is anything to support young mothers. Maybe some groups to go to so that kids can play together and you can have just a minute to drink a coffee or someone to talk to about how you are feeling.
Iāve been a single mom since my oldests pregnancy. Sheās barely 3.5y and now Iām pregnant with baby 3. I have no local family or friends, and my entire family has stopped talking to me because of this new pregnancy. My mom only calls or texts when she wants to talk to my daughters, but she drilled pro life into me. So I get it! Sometimes Iām beyond exhausted because I stay up late or use their nap time for me time. But ironically, the more exhausted I am the harder it is mentally to cope.
It helps to have a good postpartum therapist. I also suggest looking in your area for a birth to 5 program. Itās usually just a one hour home visit (or you can meet somewhere) once a week, but itās really helped me just to have someone constant. Depending on the program sometimes you can use that time to take a shower ALONE lol. But usually itās more of an emotional support for you, educational materials if you ask, connection/referrals to other programs, and they bring different toys/activities
Like someone else suggested try to look into organizations that help single mothers. Also does the government in your state help with daycare vouchers? Maybe you can get a break that way or possibly start working. Also try to see if the organizations can help with being able to see a therapist or counselor. In general itās very hard and I get what you mean when theyāre small babies itās much easier but once they start being able to move around it gets way harder.
Trending
in our community
Car seats
What the fuck is that.
Looks like no seat belt, just some bar thing, and a kid thatās small enough to be rear facing in a forward only car seat?? Someone tell me thereās more to this and itās not as crazy as it looks
8
How do single moms do it? (major rant)
Idk how i can do this anymoreš¤¦š»āāļø im a single mom and iāve been a single mom for a little over a year now, it was easier in the beginning since my son was younger but now that heās older itās been way harder. my mom has been my only support system but now she basically wants nothing to do with me, we lost my grandma (her mom) back in april an everything since then has switched between me and my mom. i understand grieving over someone is completely different for each person, but she has completely shut down how she feels about my mental health an is completely ignoring how i feel in general. my alone time an quite time have always been a big part of me but now since april she hasnāt care about my own space and itās finally catching up to me, and itās mentally draining me to the point where i want to harm myself bc i canāt take it anymore. my son was never planed, so me an the father first idea was abortion bc 1. we were 18 when we found out 2. we knew it wasnāt the time an place for it. but people got into my head saying to keep it an that imma have a strong support system if i have the baby and everything else you can think of, but where are those people now? no where to be found an donāt even reach out anymore. my einschl thought was if i went thru with the abortion i was gonna to regret it and from there i kinda went with that bc i didnāt wanna have the guilt built up in me for doing something like that so i obviously went thru with the pregnancy. but now at this point i have no support system at all to fall back on, i donāt work as i am the one to watch my son 24/7 so i canāt just leave my situation like id want to. my bf is basically my only support but heās 2 hours away an his truck is broke down so he would have to use his moms car to get to me but she works during the week so itās not even a option like iād want it to be, living with him isnāt a option either. even when my bf is around he helps with my son, but when iād like some alone time with him iām not able to majority of the time bc my mom doesnāt want to watch my son for whatever reason, idk if itās envy or what bc when i was growing up myself my mom was a single mother as-well an when she would try to get into relationships my father would always mess it up for her so sheās been single pretty much my whole life, sheās always wanted a big family but obviously never found the person, so i donāt know if she just envys me for the relationship i have with my bf or what. iāve reached out to friends about this seeking for help but all they have to say is āthis is apart of parenthoodā, wanting to harm yourself is absolutely not apart of parenthood at all. i completely understand that being a parent is sacrificing your life for your child and loosing out on a lot of things like examples iāve said before, but single mothers and mothers in general need a break sometimes. iāve been dealing with the crying, whinnying, being jumped on, hair pulled, i have bruises on my body, restless sleep at night and not being able to sleep till 3-4am everynight, all while my āsupport system of a motherā doesnāt care about any of it, when she is watching him she canāt even last 10 minutes without getting upset with him bc he gets into stuff. i also completely understand that my mom isnāt my sons parent and that i am and thatās not what im trying to indicate at all bc i do understand 1,000% i am the parent and have parental responsibilities. but wanting to harm yourself as a parent bc no one is there for you or shows up for you is 100% not okay at all. iām just seeking for help and for some advice on what to do bc iām losing myself daily.
3
5
Are your little ones walking?
Just wondering if most September babies are walking. Weāre on holiday and so many people have commented on my just turned 1 year old walking, which I didnāt expect, I thought 12 months was average age for walking, his older brother walked at pretty much exactly 12 months too
11
After school routine
What is everyone's after school routine?
My son has started reception (he's 4). We get home at about 3:30 which for me is basically morning š when he was in nursery he would come home at 6 so it was easy - dinner then bed.
I've been letting him watch a bit of TV but I don't really want him watching TV all afternoon. That's what we did as kids š
8
Plane seat purchase
Why are we having to pay extra for seats?! I really can't afford to add any more on to the expense. So I'm going to check in, and hope we are next to each other. We are a family of 5, 2 adults and 3 children.
How likely is it that we will be split - and staff care enough to give seats together? Please let me know if this has happened to anyone. I really can't be adding Ā£300 more just for tickets.
10
How do single mothers do it? (major rant)
Idk how i can do this anymoreš¤¦š»āāļø im a single mom and iāve been a single mom for a little over a year now, it was easier in the beginning since my son was younger but now that heās older itās been way harder. my mom has been my only support system but now she basically wants nothing to do with me, we lost my grandma (her mom) back in april an everything since then has switched between me and my mom. i understand grieving over someone is completely different for each person, but she has completely shut down how she feels about my mental health an is completely ignoring how i feel in general. my alone time an quite time have always been a big part of me but now since april she hasnāt care about my own space and itās finally catching up to me, and itās mentally draining me to the point where i want to harm myself bc i canāt take it anymore. my son was never planed, so me an the father first idea was abortion bc 1. we were 18 when we found out 2. we knew it wasnāt the time an place for it. but people got into my head saying to keep it an that imma have a strong support system if i have the baby and everything else you can think of, but where are those people now? no where to be found an donāt even reach out anymore. my einschl thought was if i went thru with the abortion i was gonna to regret it and from there i kinda went with that bc i didnāt wanna have the guilt built up in me for doing something like that so i obviously went thru with the pregnancy. but now at this point i have no support system at all to fall back on, i donāt work as i am the one to watch my son 24/7 so i canāt just leave my situation like id want to. my bf is basically my only support but heās 2 hours away an his truck is broke down so he would have to use his moms car to get to me but she works during the week so itās not even a option like iād want it to be, living with him isnāt a option either. even when my bf is around he helps with my son, but when iād like some alone time with him iām not able to majority of the time bc my mom doesnāt want to watch my son for whatever reason, idk if itās envy or what bc when i was growing up myself my mom was a single mother as-well an when she would try to get into relationships my father would always mess it up for her so sheās been single pretty much my whole life, sheās always wanted a big family but obviously never found the person, so i donāt know if she just envys me for the relationship i have with my bf or what. iāve reached out to friends about this seeking for help but all they have to say is āthis is apart of parenthoodā, wanting to harm yourself is absolutely not apart of parenthood at all. i completely understand that being a parent is sacrificing your life for your child and loosing out on a lot of things like examples iāve said before, but single mothers and mothers in general need a break sometimes. iāve been dealing with the crying, whinnying, being jumped on, hair pulled, i have bruises on my body, restless sleep at night and not being able to sleep till 3-4am everynight, all while my āsupport system of a motherā doesnāt care about any of it, when she is watching him she canāt even last 10 minutes without getting upset with him bc he gets into stuff. i also completely understand that my mom isnāt my sons parent and that i am and thatās not what im trying to indicate at all bc i do understand 1,000% i am the parent and have parental responsibilities. but wanting to harm yourself as a parent bc no one is there for you or shows up for you is 100% not okay at all. iām just seeking for help and for some advice on what to do bc iām losing myself daily.
4
Download the Peanut App
