Boyfriend saying I’m fat and going out too much.

I’m 10 weeks postpartum and my boyfriend keeps saying when am I going to lose weight. I was a size 8 uk before pregnancy and now I’m a size 10 and only a stone heavier. Which isn’t a big jump. But he says he couldn’t be with someone that was fat. I’m breastfeeding so I need to get my calories in so I can’t go on a complete calorie deficit. Since he’s been saying it I’ve not felt like having sex as hate being naked around him now. Is this what most partners say?

Also if I go out too much in the week. He has a problem with it saying house work needs to be done. Which I do keep on top off. It’s always tidy and clean (He does have OCD). I always make sure he has tea every night. I don’t go out for long but it’s nice to socialise as my boyfriend mostly works 7 days a week. I always use my own money as well even though he says I can take from the joint account. He just feels like he’s working 7 days a week and that I shouldn’t be going out too much (which i don’t feel like I am) I’ll go out some weeks more than others. Am I in the wrong as I don’t know for sure as he is working hard?

Apart from all of that, he’s so good with our daughter and does help in the evening with her. He works hard and does tidy after himself and he rings me on his break. So he’s got a lot more pros than cons but I just wanted to know peoples opinions on it?

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There is no world in which it would be ok for him to be making comments like this about you. He should be helping you to protect your peace and mental health, not tearing you down ❤️ growing and birthing a human being is hard work and you are so incredibly strong

Sounds like you could like about 200lbs easily, kick him out the door. It’s absolutely not what most partners are like. You’re still in a massively vulnerable stage and ultimately your body just isn’t yours right now (and never is it his!). Also him working a lot doesn’t negate you being able to leave the house. Sorry it really sounds like he’s being controlling and needs to get himself in order.

I'm going to be as kind as I can when I say this because I'm so sorry you're dealing with this, but this is mental abuse and not a good example to set your daughter for what a relationship should look like.
You've just grown a whole human in your belly. Your body now is a reflection of the child you've just spent the best part of a year creating and he's got the AUDACITY to comment negatively on the changes?? For the sake of ONE stone! Absolutely not ok at all.
Also the fact that you're adjusting to motherhood, raising the baby mostly alone since he works every day, AND keeping on top of all the housework and cooking his meals is insane. You NEED that time out the house for your sanity and he should be encouraging that. I haven't touched a dish or turned on the oven since I gave birth. My partner does it all to take the pressure off. He says he loves my belly because it's where his baby lived and I made a nice cosy home for her there.

I hope things improve or you leave him

Just because he's good with your daughter, doesnt make up for him being a crappy partner.
This is not the example you want to be setting for her!
You deserve to be in a happy, healthy relationship where you feel loved regardless of how you look, and you should be allowed to go out and see friends - if he is trying to stop this, legally this could be seen as controlling/abusive behaviour.

The first year after a baby is born (in fact the first 2 years, if you check the research) are the most physically and mentally vulnerable for a new mum. Your weight will go up and down while breastfeeding and while your hormones readjust. He needs to read a good post-partum book and become an actual partner in life, not just a boyfriend.

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Did I overreact? Or would you have done the same ? (Long post I’m sorry)

Okay so my daughter is 5 and autistic she rides the bus home from school and wears a built in harness you know okay so her normal bus was down and they put her on an alternate they forgot to tell him that she was in a strap and that I’d be there at the stop so when he came he let all the other kids off then pulled off with her still on the bus. I freaked out called the school and got 3 different answers as to what to do next then when I asked to speak with someone who knew more they tried to say it was because I wasn’t there on time once I corrected her TWICE she finally decides to call transportation. Well I call them myself and they also give me the run around it’s “well they might just bring her back” “we’ll have to find her” “just wait for us to call you back” “be more visible at the bus stop” so I amped and cussed everyone out I’m like this is a FIVE YEAR OLD we’re talking about. So the man at transportation hangs up on me when I said that wasn’t acceptable and I called the police because no one could tell me anything….. once the police called them the bus immediately turned around and brought her back to the stop. I asked the driver what happened and he said “I didn’t know she was on here the other kids were too loud” so I emailed the school and said to just put her back in the car rider line. My mom said I jumped the gun pulling her from the bus. But I was literally terrified.

AITAH- Partner says ILY

I have 3 babies
Two not his
One his
I've noticed on the way out the door everytime he will say ily INO🌸 OUR BABY
But will absolutely say nothing to my other babies.
IDC about myself cause he's never really shown me much affection and I've become numb.
I say ILY to all my babies when I leave
Simply put it they let have stopped responding to him when ever he attempts to say bye as of late. (Whenever he remembers they are there)

He just did it again and I caught the biggest attitude. I became very annoyed with him and just kinda went off on him.
Hes like I say bye completely ignoring everything I said to him. He really thought him saying bye every once in a while was my issue. Then tried to tell me i was to sensitive and that not everyone is like my family where they say ily all the time.
I legit went on an emotional let down rage fit cause IDC how he treats me anymore but to start dismissing my other two cause of our daughter is wrong. (Btw theirs a whole lot more mixed in is why I went off) this was just the trigger.

I told him to get out and don't come back till you can love all my kids. Yes I locked him out he has no key right now (he has a car)

Is this safe? Nursery (uk)

My son has recently started nursery and their outdoor play area is just wooden pallete and planks of wood and tires to climb on.
They have some bits built up to climb on but just planks and pallets balancing on tires, nothing professionally built or put together properly and it goes quite high (5ft) without any barrier or anything to hold onto.
I think they're trying to lean into risky play and allowing the kids to be independent but they don't have any normal play structures..

Maybe I worry too much but my son isn't very agile. I also worry about splinters and possible nails? I know they've probably checked over the wood but I can't be sure.

Daycare perfume

Wanted to get some opinions from the general mom community since I’ve gotten mixed feedback from different people in my life.

My three month old recently started daycare as my maternity leave is ending this week. The place is overall wonderful - highly accredited, friendly staff, and teachers that really seem to genuinely care about the kids.

I’ve got no real complaints (though there was mention in the first week that I shouldn’t use duct tape for labeling bottles because it sparked in the microwave, which uh, why was the bottle in the microwave at all?? That’s like the one bottle rule I’ve seen everywhere - don’t heat up bottles in the microwave!) but my son comes home every day smelling very strongly of perfume. It’s been my understanding that strong smells are a real no-no around infants and I’ll admit that I’ve always been sensitive to perfume, but it’s overwhelming. The smell lasts on his head hours after he gets home.

I don’t want to be a curmudgeon and police what these childcare workers wear, but I feel like I should say something? My mom has worked in early childhood development all her life and is aghast that the staff is allowed to wear perfume around kids, but my husband doesn’t think I should say anything since it’s not my place. I generally agree with him and don’t want to ruin our relationship with the staff, but I can’t get over the smell on my kid every night.

What are y’all’s thoughts? Do I get over it? Say something? Help!