Starting solids

What are our first foods? Im offering resistive foods like pineapple core, corn cob, carrots, celery, etc. until he's sitting up unassisted and losing his gag reflex more.

Im offering fatty milk with a spoon to get used to that feeding option. I have a plan for banana oat pancakes, lentil and beef pasta sauce, some easy broccoli bites, easy Indian dal and korma. I wont do any baby cereals because they all have wheat and im gluten free. Black bean brownies are on my list too, and I have a can of collards for....whatever? 🤷‍♀️

in our community

Transition to 2 kids is killing me 😭

Anyone else totally overstimulated?? I never imagined it would be so hard! 3.5 week old and 2y9m old and the absolute exhaustion is making it soo hard to cope with the two of them! I feel bad writing this but OMG! One is constantly on the boob and the other never stops talking or jumping or whinging. Today she did a poo on the floor, peed on the pouffe and bit my husband 🆘😭 I know its normal for the toddler because its a big adjustment but it doesnt make it easier to deal with day to day. Then she goes to bed and its up all night with the baby ahhhhhh. I feel like this is going to kill me! Hope its not just me 💀💀💀

Food pouches/jars

Hi girls, anybody who’s still using the pouches/ jars (Ella’s kitchen, Heinz etc)… how much of the jar or pouch do they eat? Like half or the whole thing? 😊

Partners and resentment / postpartum rage - what is the division of labour everyone doing and how are you coping ?

My partner works fully remotely yet does only 1-2 hours of childcare a day and sleeps in a separate room. I think he’s not doing enough but what’s your routine / schedules like ?

We have been sleeping in separate bedrooms since I was about 34 weeks pregnant. Now our baby is 3.5 months old we’ve sort of carried it on. Initially I was ok with this as I was recovering from a c section but I’m getting resentful I do every single night feed/change/bottle run with baby and hoping him being in the room means he does some and becomes part of this experience too. She still has 3 feeds a night, I don’t co sleep and she’s combi fed so it’s not like it’s all on me BF. When our baby was born my partner did three weeks of the night shifts with the baby before returning to work so he’s very bonded with her and capable.

I’ve repeatedly asked him when he’s coming back into the bedroom and he’s made a million excuses, ‘it’s too hot, he needs his sleep because he’s working etc…
And I’ve also asked him to do just bedtime or any overnight support - even on weekends he doesn’t, he will on a Sunday or Saturday take the baby ‘early’ from 8am so I can have a lie in. But he refuses any other night engagement and so doesn’t see or touch the baby between 6.30pm - 9.30am. The few times we have shared a bed he’s not stirred at all in the night when she’s crying next to us. It feels intentional because how can he just sleep through it?!

On the otherside of the coin he does 50% of bathtimes, occasionally takes baby out for a few hours so I can rest or relax, does dinner 90% of the time, orders all the formula and nappies, does the food shop, does most of the laundry, pays for all bills and the house (which is in his name anyway). But I have the baby a solid 22/23 hours a day and he genuinely says well you’re on holiday you’re not working. He has quite a traditional belief system so sees his role as provider not caregiver which drives me nuts as I’d rather equality not division.

What’s more frustrating is that I know his job isn’t that demanding at the moment because he goes 2hr daily gym sessions during his work day as well as all day drinks with colleagues and friends. I feel like I have to ask permission to go to the dentist or have a haircut when he’s just booking lad trips away or nights out left right and centre.

Ultimately I feel like we are living two separate realities under the same roof.

Is this how it is for everyone else on mat leave ? How are we dealing with our partners, managing rage and becoming a default parent ? Am I expecting too much - is this just what motherhood is?

Nanny job set up

Hi all!! I'm currently on maternity leave, but I'll go back to work in February... I'm starting to think about childcare and I'm getting worried about it! We have a nursery place reserved already, but we will need help in the afternoons/evenings, so we'll look for an after school nanny. Is it too soon to start contacting nannies now for February, you think? Also, I'm not very good with paperwork etc to set up the job, so I was wondering if you know of any agencies that help setting up the job once we find the nanny please?
Thanks for your help!

How bad really is TV

Is tv really as bad as the internet makes it out to be, how often do you let your LO watch it and does turning it off cause tantrums?
I have a 7 month old and he does watch little bits of tv so I can get things done around the house but I’m always seeing about how tv should never have been introduced. Obviously as soon as I’m finished what needs done and I turn it off and begin interacting again he just forgets about it but I worry soon he will cry and want it back on again.
Honestly just curious of how mums handle housework and baby and how often screen time is allowed in peoples houses 😊

Talking with partner

Hi, just wondering if anyone else's partner works 12 hour days? My partner always says he is too tired to talk about things with the kids (like dates for parents evenings etc) and so we just skip talking about it. Are there any good tactics on how or when to best time a conversation?! He seems either always at work or so tired from work he doesnt want to deal with life admin.....