Could this be postnatal depression, or is this just motherhood?

I’m 7 months postpartum and for months I’ve been feeling sad, overwhelmed, irritable, anxious and constantly exhausted.

I feel like I’ve completely lost myself. Before having my baby, I was outgoing, sociable, funny and always doing something. Now I struggle to find the motivation to do basic things like showering, housework or even reading a book. Sometimes I spend hours lying around scrolling on my phone, wanting to do things but feeling physically and mentally unable to get started. I can go days without showering, struggle to concentrate and feel like my brain just doesn’t work the way it used to. I feel incredibly lonely, guilty and like I’m constantly failing as a mum.

I worry excessively about my baby’s safety and sometimes stay awake for hours checking his breathing and temperature. I struggle to trust anyone else to look after him and feel like I can never properly switch off. Even making plans or going out feels difficult, and sometimes I feel relieved when plans get cancelled.

I feel resentful that my husband still has freedom to enjoy his life while mine feels completely consumed by motherhood. I miss my old life, my independence and the person I used to be.

I absolutely adore my son and feel so much happiness when he smiles and reaches new milestones, but I find motherhood much harder than I ever expected. I always assumed this was just how difficult motherhood was supposed to feel, but I’m starting to question whether the level of distress I’m experiencing is beyond the normal adjustment.

Has anyone experienced something similar? How did you distinguish normal adjustment from postnatal depression?

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Girl I’m nearly 7 months pp and I sometimes feel the exact same! I don’t have any advice or answers but if you need someone to talk to that can relate message me! I can’t see waves but you can always message me xx

Motherhood is insanely hard and yes I think you should speak to your GP about PND and there is some great therapy out there too xx

Do you have support? Does your husband take his role seriously?
Does he recognise when you need extra support?

It deffo sounds like you have some sort of PPA and that’s maybe extended into other aspects of your life.

I experienced all of this with my first and ultimately, it was down to lack of support. I knew I wasn’t depressed - even though that’s how I “acted”. I was just seriously overwhelmed and burnt out, trying to do everything alone.

I would recommend talking things over with your GP and husband and let them know how you feel.
Therapy really helped me back in 2023 and I still go to see her now. X

100% half of these things you mentioned are questions on the quiz they ask you to see if you have depression. Definitely mention to your dr. I felt a lot of these symptoms when expecting my daughter and how my son was going to feel and I started Lexapro and it was the best thing I ever did! I stopped crying everyday in about 3 days! It says the full effect is 6 weeks but I felt it almost immediately! Nothing wrong with needing help! ❤️

This sounds so similar to the symptoms of post partum anxiety I had with my first child - definitely reach out to your health visitor or GP to see if your local Perinatal team can help. Also Pandas foundation just offer a listening ear which is super helpful and worth checking out. Being a mum is so tough while also being so lovely - speak to anyone that will listen about whats going in for you and i promise they will get it and offers of help will start to come. Sending love ❤️

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