Advice: I don't want a SAHD bf
I always imagined that at some point I'd settle down and have a family. That I'd at least get to stay home while the kids were tiny, even if it was just when they were babies. That's not how it's gone at all.
I started dating and moved in with a guy I fell for in college. We never married even though I wanted to. He said he would eventually...
Fast forward to 2023 we'd been together for 4 years and our first son was born. I worked through the pregnancy and his early years. My bf worked on and off getting fired and laid off periodically. Now it's 2026 together 7 years. I'm 9 months pregnant with our second, he hasn't had a job since the last layoff about a year and a half ago. He's contributing some from his savings... Maybe a third of the expenses. Everything else is on me. Insurance for the kids, incidentals, ect. I even bought a house for us all. This is supposed to be our last again I've worked through the entire pregnancy and there's no plan for a break once this baby comes.
The extra frustrating part is he doesn't do much domestically. I think I could've adapted to a SAHD but I also do 80% of the work at home too. Cooking, cleaning, minding our son. Idk what to do. It feels wrong to ask that he works when I still hope that at some point I get to stay home. This is just never what I had planned for my life.
The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.
Learn more about our guidelines.
Has he been looking for a job ? I would personally tell him to get a job. Men lead and provide.
He’s stretching it for all it’s worth and doesn’t care if he loses you and the kids in the process. He thinks he has you on lock since you have 2 kids together.
Don’t let him. Tell him you quit your job because you always planned to stay at home with the kids when they were babies. If he doesn’t step up when you need him to most, you know he doesn’t care enough about anyone but himself. Leave.
Trending
in our community
Besties?
Hey! Im 27 a mama to a 6 yo, 4yo twins and pregnant, im married to a blue collar man so I solo parent a ton.
I do social media, love to read, and workout!
I would love a bestie to be able to talk to so I like friends welcome!
Feel free to message me!!
6
11
Hello 😝
Love to see so many ladies just wanting to flirt or just to have some fun so we can forget the everyday mundane BS 👌
Feeling a little deprived and wanted to see who was here 😉
5
3
Women in Business 👩🏻💻
Hey ladies, I’d love to meet some women who are interested in entrepreneurship! Whether you’re thinking about starting a business or already working toward something of your own, it would be nice to connect, share ideas, and get to know each other🫶🏼
1
3
I feel like a child 😭🥲
I feel like a little kid whose heart is breaking because I’m realizing just how lonely I am. I’m 26 years old, I go to school at my local university, and I started in Spring 2025. We’re about to enter Spring 2027, and I still haven’t made any real friends. Not one person I can randomly text, make plans with, grab coffee with, or just talk to about life. I think what hurts the most is realizing how much I miss having friendships. I’m surrounded by people at school, yet somehow I feel so alone. I never thought I’d be 26 and feel this lonely. Honestly, my heart is breaking.
3
5
Need someone to talk to
I wish I had a best friend I'm going through so much and I just wish I had someone I could call and talk to that isn't going to judge me or anything. Life has been so fking hard recently and I just feel like a failure as a mom and idk how to handle it I feel like everything is just out of my control idk how to explain it
3
8
Advice: I don't want a SAHD bf
I always imagined that at some point I'd settle down and have a family. That I'd at least get to stay home while the kids were tiny, even if it was just when they were babies. That's not how it's gone at all.
I started dating and moved in with a guy I fell for in college. We never married even though I wanted to. He said he would eventually...
Fast forward to 2023 we'd been together for 4 years and our first son was born. I worked through the pregnancy and his early years. My bf worked on and off getting fired and laid off periodically. Now it's 2026 together 7 years. I'm 9 months pregnant with our second, he hasn't had a job since the last layoff about a year and a half ago. He's contributing some from his savings... Maybe a third of the expenses. Everything else is on me. Insurance for the kids, incidentals, ect. I even bought a house for us all. This is supposed to be our last again I've worked through the entire pregnancy and there's no plan for a break once this baby comes.
The extra frustrating part is he doesn't do much domestically. I think I could've adapted to a SAHD but I also do 80% of the work at home too. Cooking, cleaning, minding our son. Idk what to do. It feels wrong to ask that he works when I still hope that at some point I get to stay home. This is just never what I had planned for my life.
4
Download the Peanut App
