Husband stitch 😡

I had my daughter may 2018 and had a lot of stitches! The day after I come home my midwife checked my stitches and I remember her brushing the conversation off very quickly with a ‘all looks ok’ and moved on! I then remember still feeling pain down below with my stitches for a while so asked my partner to check them - see if it could have been inflamed or anything and he was surprised at what he’d seen! This is when I heard about the husband stitch (somehow he knew about it, I had no idea!!) after a little google and a mirror check myself we came to the conclusion that I’d been given the dreadful stitch up!
Roll on 6 months later, we braved sex for the first time (I was ridiculously nervous!) and it hurt like no other!!! I bled and felt like I’d given birth again!
So we waited a little longer. We tried a few times and still bleeding and pain (I kept this a secret from my partner to begin with because I hate making a fuss!) fast forward to now, our daughter turning 3 in a matter of months, we’ve not had sex in well over a year because it terrifies me!!!
I have masturbated a few times so I could attempt things at my own pace and it’s the same conclusion, painful and bleeding.
I don’t know what I can do about it at this point??
The thought of sex fills me with dread but also the thought of no sex for even longer than what we’ve already done also fills me with dread!!
I really hope that someone is able to help me move on from this!

in our community

How do you get your employer to let you WFH?

I work in insurance and we have multiple agents who work from home already.

I've asked to WFH and I've been denied. Apparently no new requests for WFH are being approved anymore.

I've not been given a reason as to why just rather that I'm not allowed to.

I know it's a right to request flexible working and they have to provide a reason for this legally so I'm going to press on it a little but I'm wondering if anyone has any tips?

Thanks x

I WISH I HAD A HUSBAND WHO COOKED FOR ME

Don’t you dare comment about how your man cooks for you- you’ll just make me cry😭😂 Cuz if you do have one of those, GOOD FOR YOU, I mean it.❤️😭🥹
As for the ones who don’t, let me hear it.😤😭

Bestie

I need a bestie that will actually communicate with me. Either long distance or in Tennessee where I’m at! Message me ❤️

Would u believe this? Would you leave or stay?
Baby dad drama (pls read) I feel so angry and fed up

So I’m 11 days PP, and tbh my partner hasn’t been the best to me I’ve felt lonely my whole pregnancy and now PP he’s great with our 4 year old and newborn but with me I’ve been neglected and not bothered with for months. All the time he gets when the kids go to bed he’d rather play on PlayStation or go outside to vape

I saw on his phone that this girl had requested to follow him on instagram and asked him he said he had no idea who she was and it’s nothing. Later I saw that he actually requested to follow her first as it said “accepted your follow request” but he wasn’t following her.. I went mad and asked and he said he Dosent know how that happened cos he never followed her and I’m just like wtf.. so he told me he woke up and deleted it before I saw it. Now he’s lied and hid something, idk what to believe.. I know this sounds pathetic but we’ve had so much, a girl ringing him at 5am in my pregnancy and she tried making out it was a mistake etc, then before someone else he replied to and made out it was a mate even tho there was nothing in it, There’s always something happening his end but never his fault he says etc and wriggles his way out of it. What would you believe and most importantly ur advice on what I should do? I’ve lost all trust now.. like I said this has happened a few times now

I have no friends, no career and I feel trapped.

I’ve always found socialising really difficult. I have made a few close friends over the years, but those friendships ended up being quite toxic, and we’ve recently fallen out. In a way, I feel relieved because I’d been wanting to break that cycle for a long time, and now I finally can.

Making new friends has always been hard for me. I do try with people, but it never really seems to be reciprocated. I’m usually the one reaching out, and people don’t often ask for my number or follow up with me, which can feel quite discouraging.

I’ve also been diagnosed with ADHD and autism, which has helped explain why I’ve always felt different and why I sometimes feel like people just don’t like me. I do wonder if my fear of rejection or my desire to be liked might actually push people away without me realising.

I’ve always wanted a close group of girlfriends to spend time with and share experiences with. At the same time, because of my ADHD, I’ve struggled to stick to one career path. I’ve had so many different interests, and now I’m in my 30s without a clear career, which makes me feel quite behind in life.

I think happiness comes from having meaningful experiences with friends and family, and from doing something you genuinely enjoy. Right now, I feel like I’m missing the friendship side of that.

But I am really grateful that I have my two children — they mean everything to me.

Babies first.. everything?

Am I terrible that I don’t feel the need to buy my son gifts for his first holidays. He’s 5 months old now
We didn’t do anything crazy for Christmas, new years, Valentine’s Day, Easter. I just don’t see the point right now. He won’t remember. He gets all and every toy I think he should have to help with development. We have a case of books from my shower we barely put a dent in reading….
I just don’t see the point in spending the money right now

*first birthday will be a HUGE exception pending on movement/development at that time**