Tempted to drink or smoke

I feel like a terrible person because I am so tempted to drink or have a cigarette and I know what’s best but the hormones and weight gain and emotions are making me feel so ungrateful and emotional or emotionless… I feel like a failure as a mother and he isn’t even here yet. I just want to be the best mother I can be but my mental health is suffering. Can’t really talk to my doctor about it because my boyfriend comes to every appointment and I don’t want him to know I’m feeling this way.

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.
Add a comment
Avatar

Hey If your struggling your more than welcome to drop me a message I believe that we should all be there for each other as pregnacy can be hard expecially with hormones and other people not being able to understand there's also mental health help you could always ring your midwife in private when possible to get the support you need x

Avatar

Call your midwife and tell her how you feel x

Avatar

It’s a struggle and you’re not alone! I’ve been dealing with feeling the same way. And you’re by no means a failure as a mom. I feel completely wiped working full time all I can do is work and then sleep! I would absolutely loveeeee a glass of wine (or 3) lol. Talking with my psychologist helps a bit but it still isn’t easy. It’s a temporary time in our lives though and that’s what’s helping me get through!

Avatar

I am right there with you love, especially because I associate having a drink with relaxation. Nothing beats a nice glass of wine in the bath or beer and pizza on a friday night. Wanting to do something you like, take care of yourself or even do something fun is completely normal, understandable and It's nothing to feel guilty about or feel ashamed about. I keep telling myself that it's just a short period of time and that come summer, I'll be able to have that beer in the sunshine. :) You're not alone and all these hormones and body changes are NOT easy.

Avatar

You're not alone, I m 21 weeks pregnant I just quit smoking 3 days ago. You're mental health is important to.

Avatar

I’m with you girl, I haven’t been sober this long since I was 15yrs old and up until now I was doing really good but now that we’re in the dead of winter and there’s not much going on, I find on the weekends I get a bit bored and I get super emotional because normally I’d have a few drinks or smoke a j and I’d have so much fun.
Last weekend I wanted to go out and go to the casino and at first I was like “I can do this sober no problem!” But when we went to leave I just started crying and said to my husband “I don’t even want to go anymore it’s not fun if I can’t get tipsy.” I’ve been really trying to find new hobbies, I spend a lot of time planning for baby and online shopping but trust me, it hasn’t been easy! Gotta take it a day at a time and think that it’s only temporary, and 100% worth it for a healthy baby ❤️

Avatar

I found it hard at the beginning of my pregnancy. I’m around alcohol all the time because I’m a bartender, but it does get easier. I found some nonalcoholic ciders and wine that make me feel a little more included in social situations.
I’m looking forward to some
Fruity cocktails in the summer… I told my boyfriend I want to have a summer drink day- where he takes care of baby and I get to let loose. He’s on board.

Read more on Peanut

Trending

in our community

Reduced Movements

Has anyone else gone in for monitoring for reduced movements and as soon as you arrive at triage the baby starts moving and the CTG is normal? It makes me feel like I am over reacting.

Avatar

7

2nd pregnancy after c section

I’m not planning on getting pregnant anytime soon but in the future possibly. I just wanted to know how is pregnancy after c section like my fear is having to go through another emergency operation or even putting strain on my incision during pregnancy

Avatar

5

Newborn stage

Is anyone tired of doing the same thing everyday and being on a 2-3 hour schedule? It’s the same everyday and I feel like I’m losing my mind. It’s making me depressed even if I get out once a day. When does it get better? I feel like I’m just waiting for the next stage where it’s not just sitting around all day.

Avatar

2

11

Pregnancy after c section

What time scale did everyone get pregnant again after a c section?
I know the doc said they recommend eating at least a year to 18 months but it took 4 years to get pregnant the first time after being told we could not conceive naturally so not wanting to stop it happening knowing it could take a very long time again but also worried.

Avatar

2

18

Labour

Think im a bit confused really, i went into traige as was having contractions eveey 3-5mins. Since being here im now having them every 2-3mins which was confirmed with the machine and i think the toco was 90-100 and they feel painful and my lower back is in loads of pain but apparently im only just over 2cm dilated maybe, she has said i can stay here for a bit longer to see if things progress as had a previous quick birth as well but i dont understand why the pains are coming this quick if im only 2cm dilated and feel a bit deflated from it also.

I had a sweep this morning also.

Avatar

10

Baby due

My baby is due April 22 what should I put in my hospital bag

Avatar

3

Read more on Peanut