I think my husband has miserable husband syndrome

We’ve been together for 17 years. Married for almost ten and have 2 kids. This last year has been the hardest of our marriage. I noticed a big change in him 2-3 years ago. He started being short tempered. Sleeps a lot. Has a hard time finishing tasks or projects. I would bring up depression to him and he would get upset with me but around this time last year he agreed to go speak to a doctor. He had some blood tests that showed his estrogen was high and testosterone low. They started him on clomid and he said it has helped but it has been months and around June he started crying a lot. Going weeks without talking to me and just being mad at the world. We’ll have a good day or two and then something happens and I upset him. I had to get rid of Facebook because it made him paranoid. He’s is generally the kindest man out there and he’s such a good dad and husband but without him willing to go talk to someone I have no idea what to do. I’ve spent many nights lately feeling like I just want to walk out and leave but I love him so much and know this isn’t the real him. Has anyone gone through this and if so, how did you save your marriage? Or when did you decide it was time to walk away?

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For better or worse, through sickness and health!!! Do not leave your husband!! Especially now! Life is hard and we all have our moments, be present in his moment. Talk to him, ask him how he’s feeling, listen and listen some more. Don’t suggest solutions, just be there for him. Food has the power to heal as well. Maybe look into foods that can holistically raise his testosterone. Call his doctor let him know what’s going on and maybe he can request an appointment or suggest something to do. Don’t leave your husband! Love him through this season! Remember.. there’s always sunshine after it rains!! Good luck! Praying for you!

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First, I’m so sorry you and your husband are going through this. I can see it’s so hard on you both.

I don’t think anyone can tell you to leave or stay. Only you know what more you can handle or not. It will be important to look at the situation from all possible angles to get a clear picture of what’s happening for him.

I will offer that it could be time to go back to the doctor and check his levels again. So many things could be going on. Even if he does talk to someone the physical aspect of what’s going on has to be addressed.

For now, perhaps you can get into some counseling, therapy or coaching? I work with individual women all the time who are struggling in a really hard marriage. Reach out if you feel like this might be your next step. We can talk more about what I offer.

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