Is it selfish of me to leave my husband because he doesn’t love me & I want to find true love?

Sorry to hear that. It’s you who know how you are feeling . I don’t think you are being selfish to end a marriage you are not happy in . Also, kids can sense every emotion their parents are going through . If the parents are not happy, some how the kids can sense it. You’ve obviously tried everything and nothing has changed. Pray to God to lead you the path in making this decision .

I’m sorry to hear that, your feelings are completely valid and you’re definitely not being selfish by wanting to end what’s no longer there. I feel like it’s selfish on his end to try and stick around for your child knowing there’s nothing emotionally present. A child shouldn’t be the reason for you to stay in a relationship, because at the end of the day that causes more damage not only to you but your child as well. You’re obviously not in it anymore so why try to force something that no longer works. I hope you can figure things out, as it is very toxic to stay in a relationship where there’s no love at. Sending you a very big hug and the best wishes for you and your baby! Xx

Did you guys try to make it work, or just made up your minds that y’all don’t love each other no more?

we tried to make it work a lot of times. We went to marriage therapy at our old church & tried counseling. He says he doesn’t love me anymore & I feel the same way about it too. In the beginning I wanted to fight for our marriage because I loved him but now I don’t think I love him anymore.

Personally, I feel like a marriage is more than just loving each other. It is hard work. The same way a fire will die down if you don’t add more wood to it. Both people have to put some effort into their marriage. My husband and I went through a period of really harsh arguments every single day and I thought of leaving so many times. I had a bag packed at some point too and I felt so much anger towards him. Even through that I ended up staying. I had to give my family that I built with him a chance. No one is going to fight for my family but me, my husband and God. In the times I couldn’t handle it I prayed and reminded myself that God has me with my husband for a reason. I’m a Christian as well☺️ so as one Christian to another, I am not saying to stay but I’m also not saying to leave. I think this is a time for prayer. God has the answer for you.❤️ I’ll definitely have you and your family in my prayers!

Maybe he is being selfish for wanting to stay with me but i know that he wants the best for our son. He might be thinking that our son will be happier if stay as a family but I made him realize that’s not a good environment for him. I’m the beginning I was blind & wanted him to love me but like you said you can’t force someone to love you. We have love for each other but not in that way. Thank you so much for the wishes 🫶🫶🫶

The best thing that you can do is pray on it. I know it’s cliche but you’ll get the answer that you need. Also keep in mind that although you want to make it work for your son, it would be better for him to have two happy parents separate than two miserable ones together for the sake of him.

Yes marriage is more than love, it’s a commitment. Like you said both people have to put effort & he is not doing that. Trust me I prayed to God to fix our marriage because that’s all i wanted but in life you come to realize that sometimes we are not meant to be. I have my all to him & he doesn’t appreciate me & rather just not try anymore to fix our marriage. We come to a point were enough is enough. God knows how I feel & I ask him to help me with this process. Thank you so much!! I appreciate your kind words 🫶🫶

Your happiness is important. Your son will see that you aren't happy and it will reflect on him.

I am so right there. My husband and I have more of an arrangement than a marriage. My best friend is a guy, that I am attracted to and my husband knows this and doesn't care! I'm actually going to a concert with the bestie tomorrow and he got us a room afterwards. I'm so tempted. I am waiting because my kids are almost grown and I don't want to throw them in the middle of a mess. My husband has cheated on me with every single dating site out there too. I kind of feel like he is just waiting for me to be the bad guy.

Try a date night or mini vacation js you & him, no one think about each others wrongs or stress of life. Clean slate. Get some cute lingerie, wine if you drink and have fun! That should spark the flame… rekindle the Love!

I needed to hear this and you have said all I could have said on this post. Thank you

how did fighting for your family go for you and any changes or same situation

I’m the same way right now too. My best friend is a guy too & he is just waiting for me to take the next step. I’ve never saw myself getting a divorce nor being attracted to someone else. But because I know it’s a sin or at least that’s what I know. Don’t get me wrong. My husband is a great person! I wish he loved me the way I thought someone would. Unfortunately someone else was able to give me that happiness. Im not saying I’m leaving him for someone else but im leaving because that person has shown a me that I’m worth more & because I know I can be happy with someone else. My husband knows who he is & what we had & yet he hasn’t learned his lesson & instead of fighting for our marriage he would rather see me leave. It hurts because I loved him but now with everything I don’t feel the same way anymore.

He doesn’t believe in dates.
If I put a cute lingerie he is gonna think I’m being weird

My husband ignores me in lingerie. I have never cheated. But tonight is special and going to be tough. I even asked mine to step up because my interests are elsewhere...he just told me to go for it. He is like rude and mean all the time. Always snapping and grumpy and on the phone always. I feel dead inside unless I'm with Brian..then I feel loved and attractive and like a woman again.

I’ve cheated & he knows it. I’m ashamed of doing so but that was back a few years back. You see instead of him being like “I gotta give my wife what she needs so she won’t be looking somewhere else” I feel like he would rather have me cheat & continue together. I don’t want to do that! I want to do things right this time.

yes I feel the same way. Like he wants us to fake it and I'm not doing that to my bestie. I'm afraid if I cheat on my husband to be with him. He will never be able to trust me

So, to be honest, I would've left when he had the emotional affair. That's so much deeper than a physical affair and implies he fell in love with a whole other person. The marriage would've been dead to me at that point.

That being said, I am a child of divorce, and I can assure you your son will be fine. My parents divorced when I was 12, my mom met my step-dad, and I was able to see what a really good marriage was like before I moved out. I remember being sad and missing my dad when I was younger, but as I grew up and realized what a POS he actually was, I knew my mom did the best thing.

So no, it's not selfish. I would've done it sooner. Love might not be the only thing in a marriage, but it's a very large part of it. If you have no love, you might as way go your separate ways and coparent. It'd be more fulfilling than staying in a miserable situation for your child. Because like I said, divorce was the best thing for my mom and for me.

You totally deserve love. It's fine for your baby to have 2 dads - bio dad and a bonus dad.

Completely fine!

Not at all. Live your life the way you want, you only get one 😉