Feeling low

I just needed a little space to vent .

There's been a few things on-and-off with my mental health where I thought about going to see a counsellor again and, whilst my husband was supportive if I wanted to, asked if it is something that will make a change as I've done counselling so many times - and it ain't cheap when you also have a baby.

I just have been feeling low about my appearance and my weight. I've not been able to exercise as much as I'd like (squeezing in a workout whilst baby naps) and do often end up stress/boredom snacking when I don't want to.

My hormones are all over the place as my birth control options just keep making me bleed with only 2/3 days in between. And it makes me break out.
Then my PP hair has been awful and I ended up cutting it short which I now hate.

I honestly don't think there's any part of my body that I could say that I'm happy with.

I stress about money as I'm a full-time mum, with going back to work for 4 hours soon. But those 4 hours make me so sad that I have to be away from my baby.
Our plan was for me to wait till baby (or any future) we're at school, then go back part time. It makes me sad and feel cheated that I'm missing this time that I want. Full time mum isn't always easy, but I love my LO so much, I don't want to miss a bit.
And I would rather get pregnant again sometime next year, but I don't think partner is on board with that and I sometimes think that if I got my ED back and stopped menstruating it would just take that out of the equation.

My sex drive has also been so low - even a bit before baby was born. It can feel like going through the motion at times... My husband is amazing and I love him so much.

Sorry, I just needed to get these things off my chest

in our community

circumcision

are we circumcising our boys? or leaving that to dad?

Routines?

When did you start to introduce your baby’s routine? Do they just have a night routine or full day routine? Wondering when I should start this e.g naps at the same time everyday.

Any routines you have that work for you, please let me know them with timestamps. my baby is 6 weeks and just wondering when we should start them?

I think Motherhood has made me more bitter than I realized…

This is such a ramble but I don’t know where else to put it all.

I’m four months in and I don’t really have hobbies right now. I don’t do anything for myself except maybe doomscrolling or listening to a podcast while I breastfeed my baby. I used to craft and have game nights with friends. Activities that usually are at least 2 hour stretches. Now if I have an hour free my mind immediately goes to baby, or doing something in the house for baby.

And I thought I didn’t mind. Like I knew postpartum could be very mentally consuming. But I think it’s altering how I view people around me and it’s prodding at my relationship with my husband.

He spends most of his time making food for us, looking after our dogs, playing with the baby, ect. But he still has time for his hobby. Spends maybe an hour a night on it. Even adapted to using a bot for shopping for his hobby after a certain incident where we had to have a heart to heart after he left me home alone with the baby for hours during a busy workday (I work from home) to shop for his hobby.

And yet there’s like this little green eyed monster in me that rages every time I know he’s running off to start up the bot. Even though I’m the reason he does it this way.

We took a family trip last weekend to see his best friend and their kids and let them meet the baby. He brought the laptop. He’s always brought a laptop on trips and it’s never been a problem to me before. But one night we both woke up while the baby was still asleep, and he wandered out of the room. I tried to fall back asleep but couldn’t. So I went to the kitchen to try having something warm to drink to settle me. And he was there at the table running the bot from his laptop. I flipped out at him. But there really wasn’t reason to. It’s not like I needed help with the baby and he was ignoring me. He wasn’t avoiding our friends. He was just awake and unable to sleep and found something to do with his time. Yet my snap reaction was “why the hell would you do this on a family trip?”

I don’t know what it is. Maybe it’s the less complete sleep from baby’s middle of the night feed? My brain being just consumed by baby? Maybe I’m not as over that shopping incident as I thought? But I’m just so annoyed at his hobby right now. The green eyed monster thinks “you could be using that time differently” but realistically to do what exactly??? Stare at our baby in the dark???

I spent probably an hour apologizing to him after I snapped. And he’s of course hurt and frustrated because I said some very mean things in the moment.

I don’t want to be this jealous, angry person. But I also don’t know how to find time for myself in this right now outside of basic hygiene. It’s like I’ve forgotten how to be myself, even if just for an hour.

Maybe I need a therapist.

Complicated pp

I’m 4 weeks pp; am I the only one that has a uti and clit kinda went inward?? I’m waiting the 6 weeks but I have used a vibrator and I have a hard time feeling anything

Stroller

Hey,

Baby is getting slightly too heavy for his travel system now.

I was just wondering want strollers people recommended. Thank you

Vaccination advice

I’m really looking for advice and opinions on vaccines for my baby. I’m not against getting them but also just don’t feel like I know enough about them to make a decision just yet as I’ve had people say to me they don’t agree with them and they can cause issues etc… so I just want as much info as possible. What are everyone’s thoughts and experiences of vaccinating your child? I’m just interested to see everybody’s views (no judgement as I just want to know I’m doing the right thing) thank you x