Am I overstepping?

Am I overstepping for wanting to buy my bonus daughter a bday/Christmas gift?

Back story: Been with my partner for almost 4 years. He has a kid prior to me and we are expecting our first kid together in 2024. It has been a TOUGH rollercoaster dealing with the baby mother for these years and even now makes it difficult for him to see his kid because me and him are together. Won't let him bring the kid to the house because I'm there. I've tried to be cordial with the BM with no luck. I'm over the drama and just want to do for my bonus daughter as I would my own kid. BM has another kid by someone else and is not blessed in the financial department as me and my partner are so part of me feels like she will feel disrespected if I buy something for her like I'm trying to throw it in her face that she can't afford it when that's not the case. At the end of the day, our kids will be siblings.

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you didn't really answer my question lol. He doesn't even buy for the other kid and respectfully, the other kid is not my responsibility. I want to buy for HIS other kid which would be my kid's sibling.

buy it and just say it's from the father to avoid the backlash she won't know and she won't have nothing to say i feel like BM's like that just be wanting a reason to argue just try to avoid it if she's not trynna be cordial at all and work around it

Your heart is in the right place and I think it’s great you wanna buy a gift for her. Regardless of what bio mom thinks you’re doing right by your bonus daughter and that is what is most important

we were thinking this but I think it is so ridiculous for us to have to hide the fact that I want to buy something for her. Like girl let it go 🙄

respectfully her other kid is not my or his responsibility. And if we were on good terms maybe I'd consider it. But we're not. Her other kid is also a half sibling to his daughter because they don't have the same mom or dad.

Yeah but u gotta understand her POV also idk what's going on in her head and you can't communicate with her to figure it out so just let her be and avoid anything you feel like might cause her to overreact for your own sanity nobody wanna live in drama 24/7 have fun live your life and stop worrying about her i feel like that's what they want too for yall to be steady thinking bout her don't give her that satisfaction treat her like she's not apart of yall equation until she feel the need to want to communicate better if she don't it is what it is who cares let her be crazy on her own & just live your own life

luckily he is going through the court process now. Cuz I can't do more years of bitterness. It's been too long.

that's all he had to do honestly fathers have their rights too all they gotta do is go through the courts if they have a difficult BM if they really wanted to see their child

my family inc my mum and other sisters are buying for one of my sisters step kids so i dont see why its a problem for you to buy her a present 🤷🏼‍♀️

you read the back story? BM is bitter. And I don't want to interfere with my partner's ability to see his daughter because she is very much that spiteful

i did but even if she is bitter youre not overstepping.
if you dont want to make out like the present is just from your partner you could have from your partner and you. any presents you both choose are from both of you.
she does sound like hard work.

girl hard work is an understatement 😂 and yeah I'm gonna just get the gift and he's gonna say it's from us.

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